


Seconds

by gamewriter47



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Compliant, Canon Era, Canon Related, Clexa - Relationship - Freeform, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Romance, Roommates, Sexual Tension, Sprinklings of fluff, Violence, Younger Clexa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-08
Updated: 2016-02-21
Packaged: 2018-04-13 15:58:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 31,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4528263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gamewriter47/pseuds/gamewriter47
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Same world, same people, different timeline.</p>
<p>It's been several years since the Sky People have joined the Coalition of the 12 Clans (now 13). In an effort to encourage assimilation among clans, those of age have the choice of journeying to the Coalition Center and training to become either a Warrior or a Healer. There they are assigned another person to be their Second, one who they will fight and train with, and eventually trust with their life. Because the Coalition Center is filled with very real dangers, and only the strongest will survive the program. </p>
<p>Clarke is one of the few from her clan who chooses to go. There she meets a girl from the Woods Clan, who is rumored to be divinely chosen...of what Clarke isn't so sure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Coalition Center

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all!
> 
> This is my first fanfic for The 100. I took some elements from a few different stories I like (you'll notice in the first chapter there are a few similarities to the Sorting from Harry Potter) and combined them to create a new timeline in the same post-apocalyptic world from the show. Clarke and Lexa are the same age as they are in the show, the difference being that the effort to form an alliance with all the clans (including the Sky People) happened much before their lifetimes. Lexa is not the Commander (yet), and Clarke has never met anyone from the other clans, besides her own. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy. This is going to be a multi-chapter fic, so feedback is greatly appreciated!! Apologies for any errors I may have missed!

 

“Clarke.”

“Clarke…”

“CLARKE!”

Clarke woke with a start, her head smacking painfully against the small shelf above her bed. She swore and then looked up at her mother, who was stifling a laugh behind her hand.

“It’s ten in the morning Clarke. I thought you’d have been ready by now,” said Abby.

“It’s ten?!” exclaimed Clarke, scrambling out of bed. She began to hastily pull on the clothes she had thrown about the night before. “Damn it! I must have forgotten to set my alarm last night!”

“Forgotten? That’s not like you,” Abby remarked. She took a quick breath, preparing to breach a sensitive subject. “Are you absolutely sure you want to do this Clarke? Nobody expects anything from you.”

Clarke huffed, trying unsuccessfully to pull on her left boot and jacket at the same time.

“I’ve told you mom,” she said, “That’s exactly the problem. Everyone thinks that just because I’m the Chancellor’s daughter, I have this privileged, carefree life.” She glanced around her spacious room, knowing how different it was from those who lived outside the Sky People’s land. “And they’re not wrong. But I want to change that. I want to do something…meaningful. I want to help people.”

Abby looked at her daughter, the determined look on Clarke’ face something she knew all too well. She smiled.

“I’m proud of you, Clarke. You’re braver than most who sit on our Council. But please, promise me you’ll be careful. Those kids from the other clans, they were raised different from you. They are used to a much harder life.”

Abby raised her hand, seeing Clarke about to protest. “I’m not saying I don’t think you can do it. Just don’t take on anything you can’t handle. Be smart, Clarke. Don’t let anyone make you question who you are.”

Clarke nodded, taking her mother’s advice to heart. But she was ready. She had been waiting for today for as long as she could remember.

“Thank you.” Clarke blinked quickly, holding her tears at bay. They had said their farewells the night before, Clarke not wanting to make her first appearance at camp with a runny nose and red eyes. “So I’ll see you…?”

“Eight months,” said Abby through a watery smile. “Seconds always visit each other’s homes once they’ve passed the first trial together. Depending on where yours comes from, it may be sooner.”

Clarke nodded again, not trusting herself to speak without her voice shaking. She picked her bag up off the floor and swung it over her shoulder, then, in two purposeful steps, gave her mother a tight hug.

“Be brave, sweetheart,” Abby said softly.

She gave her one more squeeze and then, Clarke was off. 

* * *

 

Clarke nearly cried out in relief when she saw she hadn’t missed the convoy.

There was a group of four waiting at the pickup point, all of whom Clarke knew by name. Despite the years of peace among the 13 clans, the Sky People were still by far the smallest community. Neither Sky nor any of the original 12 clans were too keen on mixing gene pools quite yet. When Clarke first heard this she thought it was absurd, but she realized it did make sense when she thought about it. She couldn’t remember the last time she saw someone her own age from another clan.

“Hey, look who showed up after all!”

Clarke slowed her pace and clutched at the stitch in her side, trying to retain some of her dignity. She waved halfheartedly at Jasper, the boy who shouted her arrival.

“Got a bit of a late start,” Clarke breathed, trying to mask her panting. She came to a stop and stood next to the small group, all of who were surveying her with mixed expressions.

Octavia, the only other girl present besides Clarke, gave her a haughty smirk.

“Nice of you to join us, Princess,” she teased, “We thought you bailed for sure.”

Clarke grounded her teeth at the nickname they appointed to her. Finn had started it a few months back and, much to Clarke’s dismay, it had spread among the younger ones in the Ark. She was determined to prove herself worthy of shedding the nickname.

“It was a rough night,” she said irritably.

As if on cue, Finn strolled up to the group not two seconds later, an anguished look on his face not much different than Clarke’s.

“And where the Princess goes, Finn shall soon follow!” laughed Jasper. The boy next to him, Monty, elbowed him sharply in the ribs. He obviously did not get the news.

“Not anymore, actually,” mumbled Clarke. She met Finn’s eye for a brief, awkward moment. He was the reason she had been so scatterbrained last night and forgot to set her alarm. She had broken up with him that morning, only two days after their six-month anniversary. She regretted her timing, but it was something that had been coming for a long while.

Luckily for Clarke, she was spared the rest of this awkward interaction as they heard the sound of the gates to the Ark being opened, and convoy of three large, uncovered wagons began to make their way towards them.

“That’s it?” Clarke asked, as the convoy rolled to a stop in front of their group. Besides the drivers, there were only eight other people on the convoy, scattered throughout the three wagons. “I thought there’d be more.”

Bellamy, who had previously been silent throughout their exchange, answered Clarke as he stood.

“This convoy only goes to the three farthest clans. The rest require their candidates to make the journey to the Coalition Center on foot.”

“Great,” Clarke groaned. She was already worried enough about those from other clans thinking she was soft, and knew this would definitely not help her case.

“Well kids, let’s roll!” exclaimed Octavia excitedly. She jumped onto the nearest wagon, followed soon after by Finn and the rest of the boys. Clarke climbed up behind them and as soon as she sat down, the wagon lurched and they were on their way.

She looked over her shoulder as they went through the gates for one last look at the Ark. The safe, comfortable home she had always known slowly became smaller in the distance, and although Clarke could not ignore the pang of sadness in her chest, she felt, for the first time, excited about what the next day would bring.

* * *

 

The sun was just beginning to set when the convoy rolled to its final stop. There was an air of sudden excitement among the Sky People, as this was the first time any of them had been among those from other clans. Clarke sat up straight quickly, trying to shake her mind of the numbness that had set in during the journey.

A tall woman dressed all in armor, her face streaked with black paint, waited for them on the ground as they awkwardly climbed out of the wagon. Once Clarke and the thirteen others on the convoy lined up in front of her, the woman stepped forward and spoke.

“My name is Indra.” Her voice was strong, and commanded respect. There was no doubt who was in charge here. “I commend you on your decision to train at the Coalition Center. I can assure you these will not be an easy 18 months. But those of you who manage to make it to the end; you will be the beginning of a new generation. One that will cross clan boundaries and truly unite the people of our coalition.”

Clarke glanced down the line of her peers, each one wearing the same expression of rapt attention. She swallowed nervously.

“You have arrived just in time for the opening feast,” Indra continued, “During this time you will learn more about what will be expected of you during your stay at the Coalition Center. You will also be assigned your Second at the end of the feast. Now, this way.”

Indra led them through the gates and into the main square of the Coalition Center. In the center of the square was a fountain, a large, granite ball rotating slowly as water poured down its sides. Surrounding the fountain was a number of vendor stalls, crafting all kinds of weaponry, armor, and common medical supplies. Beyond that were several rows of two person tents, where Clarke assumed they would be sleeping. Further beyond that was a large gathering hall, flanked by two small gardens on either side. Indra motioned them inside, and Clarke followed the line of her companions into the hall.

Clarke’s palms suddenly became very sweaty. She had never seen so many people her age in one place. There must have been 100 other teenagers at least, sitting around 12 different tables, each with the flag of their clan hanging overhead.

As Clarke made her way towards the Sky People’s table, she noticed how different those from each clan looked. The table nearest the entrance held those from the Desert Clan, all of whom were thin and had dark brown skin. The next table was the Ice Nation, tall and extremely pale with sharp, unfriendly features. A few of them scowled at Clarke as she walked by, and she increased her pace.

Clarke sat down next to Octavia as she reached the Sky People’s table.

“Looks like we’re a little underrepresented here,” said Octavia, craning her neck as she looked around at the other clans. Clarke mimicked her actions and noticed she was right. All the other tables had fifteen candidates at least. The Sky People’s table looked dismal with just the six of them.

“Are you nervous about getting your Second?” Bellamy asked Clarke. “I just hope I don’t get anyone from the Ice Nation. They definitely don’t look the friendliest.”

Clarke, remembering their scowls, nodded in agreement.

“I want someone from the Woods Clan,” answered Octavia. “I’ve been reading papers about them on the Ark. They’re supposed to be divine or something right? The Commander of the 13 Clans is always chosen from their people.”

“You believe that?” Finn scoffed. “Sounds a little farfetched to me.”

“What do you know, Finn?” growled Octavia. “I’m sure a flying hunk of metal in the sky seemed farfetched to the other clans too, but here we are.”

Clarke glanced at the Woods Clan table, only two down from theirs. She had to admit, they did look pretty formidable. All the candidates had black paint smeared on their faces like Indra, with tall, lean, warrior bodies. There were thirty of them seated around the table, each with an expression as intense and focused as the last. As Clarke scanned their faces she jumped, startled to see a girl with dark green eyes staring back at her.

“Candidates, thank you for making the journey to the Coalition Center,” spoke Indra, standing up at head table. Clarke quickly looked away from the girl with green eyes and shifted her focus to the woman speaking. “Please enjoy the food we have prepared for you this evening. When you are ready, step forward to receive the name of your Second.”

There was a murmur of excitement throughout the crowd. Clarke’s heart started beating faster.

“For those of you who don’t know,” Indra continued, “Your Second will be your partner for the duration of your stay here. You will share living quarters, eat together, and train together; you will receive the same rewards, and endure the same punishments. If you are training to be a Warrior, you will get paired with a Healer, and vice versa.” Indra paused to stare severely down at all of them. “I will not accept any complaints or requests to be reassigned a new Second. You will support and defend your given Second until death, if you must.”

A ripple of tense whispering spread throughout the hall. Clarke felt her palms become clammy again. Death? Was that a possibility?

“Yes,” Indra said, correctly guessing their concerns. “There will be death. The quests you will be sent on throughout your training are very real, and very dangerous. Those of you who make it to the end will be chosen to serve the Coalition and protect our people through any danger that may arise. It is, therefore, imperative that you have complete trust in your Second. I cannot guarantee your survival if you choose otherwise.”

At this, Indra sat down and waiters streamed down the rows of tables, placing various kinds of meats and fruit in front of their plates. There was a moment of stunned silence at the abrupt end to Indra’s speech, but soon the sounds of scraping forks and muffled conversation filled the hall as the candidates began to eat.

“Fuck,” murmured Octavia. “I really hope my Second doesn’t suck.”

Clarke remained silent but wholeheartedly agreed. She reached forward and forced herself to eat, her stomach squirming uneasily with nerves. When she couldn’t take it anymore she stood up and walked outside the hall, turning to walk through one of the small gardens outside. She spotted a small fountain in the middle of the vegetation and began to make her way towards it when a movement among the trees caught her eye.

A girl, tall with long dark hair, emerged from the tree line. She shoved her sword into the sheath on her back as she walked, eyes fixed on the ground, lost in thought. The girl was coming straight towards her and Clarke, not feeling too much like making conversation, moved to dart behind the low wall surrounding the fountain.

“ _Chon ste der_?” the girl called, and Clarke froze at the commanding sound of her voice. She turned, surprised to see that the girl was only 15 paces away now, her hand hovering over the sword on her back.

“S-sorry?” Clarke answered. Feeling foolish, she stood up from her hiding place. The girl walked slowly towards her. Clarke wasn’t sure why, but her heart stuttered nervously as the girl stepped into the light. She had black paint smeared on her face and dark green eyes...

“I saw you,” blurted Clarke, “In the hall. You’re a candidate.”

The girl came to a stop in front of her. She looked Clarke up and down, like she was sizing her up.

“You are a warrior?” the girl asked. Clarke had never heard someone speak quite like this girl did. Her heart started to beat fast again. This time she wasn’t so sure it was from nerves.

“No. A Healer,” Clarke answered. The girl smirked and her posture relaxed. Clarke couldn’t help but notice how pretty she was.

“That explains it.”

“Explains what?” Clarke asked edgily. The tone of the girl’s voice gave her a sense she should be offended.

“You are not light on your feet,” the girl answered. “I heard you before you even decided to move.”

“Yeah, I probably should work on that,” Clarke mumbled, embarrassed. But the girl was not laughing at her. She was watching her, eyes squinted slightly, as if Clarke was something she couldn’t quite identify.

“ _Leksa kom Trikru_ ,” the girl said, stretching out her hand. Clarke did the same and grasped the girl’s forearm, thankful for the dim lighting that covered her sudden blush.

“Clarke. Of the Sky People,” she added quickly. She wasn’t used to stating her clan after her name, but it made sense, now that she was among so many.

“ _Skaikru_ ,” Lexa said quietly. There was a brief flash of surprise on her face, but it was gone so quickly Clarke was sure she imagined it.

“Right. And _trikru_ , that’s Tree People, right? From the Woods Clan?” Clarke suddenly realized she was still holding on to Lexa’s arm and quickly dropped her hand.

Lexa nodded once. “I do not know much of the _skaikru_ ,” she admitted, “My people do not have many records of them.”

“That’s not surprising,” Clarke sighed, well aware of her people’s self-imposed isolation from the rest of the coalition.

Their conversation was interrupted by the sound of the hall door opening, a slow stream of people beginning to exit and make their way towards the tents.

“The assignments must have begun,” said Lexa, turning to look at the hall. Clarke took her moment of distraction to look at the girl again. She thought about what Octavia said, and wondered if those from the Wood Clan actually were divine.

Lexa turned back to her. “May we meet again, Clarke of the Sky People.” She nodded once and then strode off towards the hall.

Clarke watched Lexa leave, trying to settle her nerves before she went back in to receive her Second. She followed the other girl’s path several moments later, and when she arrived back in the hall, there were only a handful of candidates left. Clarke joined the small queue near the head table, heart hammering in her chest.

The line went out the hall through a side door and into a small connecting tent, in which only one candidate at a time was allowed to enter. When Clarke was finally at the front, Indra emerged from inside the tent and held the flap open, gesturing her inside.

Clarke crossed the threshold to find herself in a dark room lit only by a dozen or so candles, all of which were surrounding a young woman who could only have been a few years older than Clarke. Her eyes were closed and she was sitting cross-legged on a large pillow. She was dressed in a simple brown tunic, her face and arms adorned with scrawling lines of black ink and her hair full of intricate braids.

When Clarke was only a few steps away, the woman’s eyes opened. Clarke froze.

“Sit,” said the woman. Her voice reminded Clarke of Lexa’s, and she immediately obeyed. “State your name and path of study.”

“Clarke.” She swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry. “Of the Sky People. I want to be a Healer.”

The woman stared at her for several long seconds. Not knowing what else to do, Clarke stared back, becoming increasingly more self-conscious the longer the woman remained silent.

Then, finally, she spoke. “Tent 7. You will find your Second already waiting.”

Clarke stared. That was it? The woman looked pointedly at the back exit of the tent. Clarke stood up abruptly.

“Thanks,” she offered lamely, and then walked quickly out of the tent.

She went to the area of tents she had passed earlier and went down the first row, looking up at the numbers scrawled on the side of each as she passed. Four… six… seven!

Clarke stopped outside of her tent, taking a deep breath in an attempt to stifle her suddenly fluttering stomach. Then, biting the bullet, she threw the flap back and strode into the tent, gasping in surprise when she saw who was waiting for her inside.


	2. Assignment Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> Thanks so much to all who left comments/kudos! It really does motivate me to write faster.  
> I hope you enjoy this next part; things are going to start getting hectic in the coming chapter!
> 
> Can't wait to see where this story takes us :)

“Lexa!”

Lexa stood up from the bed at her entrance. Unlike Clarke, she didn’t seem surprised at all by their pairing.

“Clarke.” She nodded that quick, almost imperceptible nod.

Clarke couldn’t help but stare, still standing awkwardly in the entrance of the tent. Their tent. For the next 18 months at least. She felt her face warm with the familiar blush that for some reason Lexa brought out in her.

“Sorry,” said Clarke abruptly, realizing neither of them had spoken for the last few moments. “Um…”

Lexa shrugged and sat down on her bed. She motioned to the one across from her. “That one’s yours.”

“Thanks.”

Clarke sat on the bed Lexa had pointed to. There was a small nightstand next to the bed. She pulled open a drawer to find several sets of clothes. Lexa, Clarke noticed, was wearing the shorts and tunic the camp had provided.

“I apologize,” said Lexa, “For staring earlier.”

Clarke looked up at her, momentarily confused, before remembering when they had first seen each other in the hall.

“I have never seen…”Lexa paused, as if she was searching for the right words, “Your hair- it is yellow.”

Clarke let out a surprised laugh. That was the last thing she had expected to hear. “It’s alright. It doesn’t seem to be very common these days.”

Lexa looked at her for another moment, and Clarke suddenly felt a reckless urge to know what the other girl was thinking.

“We should sleep,” Lexa said, looking away. The urge disappeared. “Tomorrow will be a difficult one.”

“Do you know much about this place?” Clarke asked. She started to pull off her boots. “We’re the first group of Sky People to attend, so no one was really able to tell us much.”

“I don’t know much more than you,” answered Lexa. “Except that there are many who do not return. Those who do are not allowed to speak of their time here. The best warriors are able to prepare for anything.”

Clarke swallowed nervously, Lexa’s answer doing nothing to ease the constantly growing anxiety in the back of her mind.

“Do not worry Clarke,” Lexa said, sensing her change in mood. “I will not let anything harm you. It is our job, as Seconds, to protect each other during our time here.” She smirked, her shoulders straightening. Clarke’s heart stuttered a beat. “And I can assure you, I am no stranger to the sword. I have been training to be a warrior since I was two.”

Lexa’s confidence rolled off her in waves, and Clarke couldn’t help but feel herself trusting her, although they had only met a few hours ago. There was something about Lexa. She had never been affected by someone this much, and so soon.

“Good to know,” said Clarke, sounding slightly more breathless than she had intended to. “I should probably, um, change then…” She trailed off, looking at the small piles of clothes provided for her. She bit her lip, trying to think of the least awkward way to do this, but when she looked up Lexa was already politely turning away.

“Sleep well, Clarke,” Lexa said over her shoulder. She laid back on her bed, and Clarke couldn’t help but stare at her for a few more moments, just now noticing that the other girl’s hair was free of her intricate braids and hanging loosely down her back.

Clarke gulped and hastily turned away, pulling on her nightclothes and trying to quiet her flustered mind. She slipped under the furs on her bed and leaned over, blowing out the candles that were on the table between their beds. She dropped back on her pillow and stared at the canopy above her, thoughts whirling with what the morning would bring.

* * *

 

“Clarke.”

Clarke awoke with a start to find Lexa standing over her, one hand gently shaking her awake. Her hair was in braids again, her eyes bright and alert.

“Sorry,” mumbled Clarke, quickly sitting up. Lexa straightened up and began moving around their tent, pulling on light pieces of armor as she went. Clarke watched her for a moment, eyes lingering a bit longer than would have been considered polite as Lexa strapped on ankle braces. The other girl was dressed only in tight shorts and a top with no sleeves. Clarke found it was a bit hard to breathe.

“Have I overslept?” Clarke asked, tearing her eyes away from Lexa’s legs.

Lexa shook her head. “I’ve been awake for awhile. But we should head to the square soon. We are receiving our first assignment today.” She strode over to the open trunk she had been pulling armor out of and grabbed two identical shoulder guards, each stained a deep, dark red.

“These are to signify our allegiance to each other,” Lexa explained. She handed one to Clarke and strapped the other one on herself. “I shall meet you in the square. I have something I need to attend to first.”

Clarke nodded, swallowing the urge to ask what exactly that something was. “Right, yeah, I’ll see you there in a bit.” She watched Lexa leave and let out a few shaky breaths as the tent flap fluttered closed.

If they were going to be Seconds, Clarke really needed to get rid of this sudden buzzing feeling that spread throughout her entire body whenever Lexa was around. It was quite distracting, and from what Lexa had told her last night, she could not afford to be anything but focused if they were to survive their time here.

She got up and opened her own trunk, which contained a lot fewer pieces of armor than Lexa had put on. In addition to the shoulder guard Lexa had given her, Clarke put on a pair of studded gloves that reached up to her elbows and a light but sturdy piece of chainmail that she put over her shirt. She pulled on her boots and clipped on her shoulder guard, pulled the top of her hair into a small braid and then walked out into the campgrounds.

There were several other candidates milling about, most walking in pairs, each with different matching colored shoulder guards like hers and Lexa’s. As she made her way towards the square she saw a crowd around several of the vendor stalls, each making different kinds of weapons that many candidates were swinging lightly, testing their weight.

“Clarke!”

She turned at the sound of her name, seeing Octavia waving frantically next to a tall, dark-skinned man. She walked towards them, feeling relieved at seeing a familiar face.

“Clarke, Lincoln. He’s my Second,” said Octavia as she approached. Lincoln nodded in greeting. They were both wearing shoulder guards of a dark blue. “Where’s yours?”

“Good question,” Clarke sighed. She scanned the crowd quickly, but saw no sign of Lexa. “I should probably go and find her. Have you guys gotten your assignment yet?”

“Nope,” answered Octavia. “We just picked up our weapons. We’re about to head over to the hall now. Have you seen anyone else from the Ark yet?”

Clarke shook her head, starting to feel overwhelmed as the square became steadily more crowded. “No. I just came here straight from my tent.”

“Well, you better get a move on. We’ll see you around then. I’ve been eager to get started already,” said Octavia, barely containing her excitement. “Good luck!”

At that Octavia and Lincoln walked off toward the hall and Clarke continued to move toward the center of the square. She glanced curiously at the stalls she passed, trying to decide which weapon would work best for her. They all looked too large and clunky for Clarke’s taste. They were required to take shooting lessons at the Ark, but she had never touched a sword in her life. She doubted she’d be of much use to anyone.

“Clarke?!”

Clarke stopped, turning at the unexpected voice. It had come from the smallest stall at the end of the row, a number of small guns on display.

“Raven!” Clarke stared, recognizing the girl from the Ark. “What are you doing here? You weren’t with us on the convoy yesterday.”

“I got here this morning,” she replied, eyeing Clarke curiously. “You know I didn’t believe it when I heard, but I guess the Princess really did make the journey after all.”

Clarke clenched her fists. Looks like the animosity the girl had for her because of Finn was still very present.

“I broke up with Finn you know,” said Clarke. “You were right about him. I should have listened.”

“Caught on finally, have you?” she sneered. But she seemed to soften considerably when she spoke next. “No one from the other clans trusts our weapons,” Raven explained, motioning to the line of guns in front of her. “They asked me to come and provide some, in case any Sky People wanted to use them.”

Clarke nodded and examined the small gun in front of her, much more familiar with the weapon than those she had passed previously. She picked it up and Raven handed her a holster. She strapped it around her leg and holstered her new gun, the weight comforting her slightly.

“Thanks,” said Clarke, “Will you be staying in camp, then?”

“Mostly. I’ll have to go back to the Ark a couple times to restock on ammo and stuff. How’s your Second?”

“She’s…good,” said Clarke, knowing it was impossible to describe what exactly Lexa was. She wasn’t even sure she knew herself. “I need to go find her actually. We’re getting our first assignment today.”

“Look by the fountain,” suggested Raven. “Everyone is waiting over there.”

Clarke waved goodbye to Raven and headed toward the fountain. A larger crowd was gathered there, and the buzz of excitement in the air was unmistakable. Clarke again began her scan for Lexa. Instead she made eye contact with the last person she wanted see. She cursed under her breath as he walked over.

“Hey Princess,” grinned Finn. He was wearing a light brown shoulder guard, and appeared to be alone. “Waiting for your Second too?”

“I told you I hate that name Finn,” said Clarke testily. “And yes. I really wish she would get here already.”

“Mine’s over there, talking to her friend or something.” He gestured to a pair of girls sitting on the fountain. With a jolt, Clarke realized that one of them was Lexa. She was leaning close to the other girl as they spoke. A little too close, Clarke thought, than what would be considered a friendly distance.

“That’s my Second- the one yours is talking to.” Clarke forced her voice to be nonchalant. “Who is she? Your Second, I mean,” she clarified.

“Costia. From the Woods Clan.”

As Finn spoke, Clarke watched as Lexa put her hand on the other girl’s arm. The smile that they shared sent an unexpected wave of jealously through her, the desire to have Lexa smile at _her_ like that almost unbearable.

Lexa looked up then, her eyes meeting Clarke’s automatically. She stood up and gestured for the other girl to follow, both making their way to where Clarke and Finn stood.

“Clarke,” Lexa said, and nodded to Finn. Clarke hated how her stomach fluttered at the way she said her name. “This is Costia. We grew up in the same village.”

“Hey,” said Clarke, grasping the new girl’s forearm. She noticed with a pang how pretty she was up close.

“We should head to the hall Clarke,” said Lexa. Clarke nodded in agreement, more than anxious to get away from the other pair.

“Right. See you guys around,” said Clarke. She followed Lexa as they walked out of the square. “So you and Costia,” Clarke started, trying to keep her tone neutral, “You’re…close?”

Lexa looked at her as they walked, her expression unreadable. “We have known each other for a long time,” she said finally. “We trained together for as long as I can remember. Costia has…she has helped me through a lot.”

Clarke wanted to ask more but Lexa turned away and increased her pace, giving the unmistakable indication that their conversation about this subject was over. Clarke hurried to keep up with Lexa’s long strides; she didn’t slow down until they were walking through the entrance of the hall.

There were several large, aggressive looking men sitting along the head table, each with a short line of candidates in front of them. Indra stood at the end of the lines, directing pairs to different queues.

“ _Leksa_ ,” said Indra as they approached. She tilted her head forward, and Clarke was surprised to find something that looked a lot like reverence on her face.

“Indra,” Lexa nodded. She did not seem surprised by Indra’s uncharacteristic show of respect towards her.

“Go to Gustus, the farthest line,” Indra instructed.

Lexa continued on without another word and Clarke followed behind, her mind reeling with new questions. But she had the distinct impression that Lexa would not be any more forthcoming than she was about Costia.

When they reached the front of the line that Indra had indicated, Clarke watched as the man named Gustus spoke Lexa’s name in the same reverential tone.

“You are tasked with ridding a nearby village of a rogue _pauna_ ,” said Gustus. “The village is a day’s journey north. The _pauna_ in question has been the source of many deaths and continued destruction of the village’s land. It is imperative that it be dealt with before any more are harmed.”

Clarke glanced at Lexa, who grasped Gustus’ hand and strode quickly to a nearby table, upon which several bulging packs were lined up for the candidates to take. Lexa swung one over her shoulder and tossed one to Clarke, who did the same.

“Lexa,” Clarke asked as they made their way out of the hall again. “A _pauna_ …I don’t know that word. What is it?”

Lexa glanced at her for the first time since she asked about Costia. “I do not know your word for it,” she said, frowning slightly, “But it is a creature that will not be dealt with easily. They are stronger than many beasts that still roam our wild. More intelligent than most as well.” Lexa sighed and readjusted the sword on her hip. “It will be difficult. I’m not entirely sure how we will subdue it.”

Clarke sucked in a breath, ignoring the spike of fear that shot through her at Lexa’s words. But she was ready. This was it. Finally, it was time to prove herself.

“Right,” she said, sounding more confident than she felt. “When do we leave?”

“Now,” answered Lexa. They were almost to the gates of the camp. “You have your weapon?”

“Yes.” Clarke pointed at the gun on her hip. “Is your sword all you’re taking?” asked Clarke. She felt like a gun might be a little more effective, especially considering how strong Lexa had said the creature they were hunting would be.

“I do not like guns,” Lexa said, eyeing Clarke’s holster warily. “My sword will be more than efficient.”

Clarke and Lexa stopped, pushing open the creaking gates before them. With one final look back at camp, Clarke turned to Lexa, who was giving her that cocky smirk that made Clarke’s knees shake.

“To a safe journey,” said Lexa. Her eyes held an excitement that Clarke had not yet seen in Lexa. There was no doubting she was in her element now.

And at that they were off, walking swiftly into the dark forest ahead.


	3. The Pauna: Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!
> 
> This one is a bit shorter than the other ones, but I promise Part 2 will make up for it! 
> 
> Keep in mind that this story's version of Clarke and Lexa have not gone through all the horrors and moral dilemma's as their TV counterparts, so they still have some of their innocence and teenagery (that's a word right?) habits intact. Well, for now at least.
> 
> Hope you enjoy! Thanks again to those who left comments, I really appreciate it :) This chapter turned out to be fluffier than I originally intended...I couldn't help myself.

The sun was just beginning to set as Clarke and Lexa trudged along, Lexa in the lead with Clarke a few paces behind. Clarke’s legs were burning and she kept stumbling over the uneven terrain. She glared at Lexa, who was striding easily through the overgrowth, showing no signs of fatigue.

“They couldn’t have given us horses or something?” Clarke panted grumpily.

“Horses are valuable,” answered Lexa. Clarke was annoyed to hear she wasn’t even out of breath. “We have to earn them. If we don’t first learn to protect ourselves, we can’t hope to protect them.”

“Can we at least take a break then? We haven’t stopped walking since we left.” Without waiting for an answer, Clarke plopped down on a nearby tree stump and shrugged off her pack. Lexa stopped and looked over her shoulder, sighed impatiently, and walked back towards her.

“Did your Sky People not teach you anything about survival?”

Clarke, already in a bad mood, narrowed her eyes. “Life is about more than just surviving. We were taught other things. Medicine, philosophy, science.”

“What good are those if you can’t even protect yourself?”

“We’re not at war anymore Lexa,” Clarke said, her temper growing steadily. “We can afford to devote our lives to other things now.”

Lexa, showing the first sign of any emotion whatsoever, scoffed and started pulling bark irritably from the stump they sat on. “Your people are close-minded Clarke. The world is not as peaceful as they’d have you believe.”

“Close-minded,” laughed Clarke unkindly, “I’ve heard stories about your people too. Torture, treating killing like it’s something to be proud of, to be rewarded for. I’d take being close-minded over acting like savages any day,” she spat.

There was a flick of…something on Lexa’s face. Surprise, hurt. But Clarke didn’t stick around to find out. Without another word she shoved off the stump and marched off in the direction of their destination. She didn’t look back to see if Lexa followed, but she was not surprised when she appeared beside her several moments later. Lexa didn’t try to continue their conversation and neither did Clarke, and it wasn’t until there was a sliver of light left in the sky that Lexa spoke again.

“We should choose a spot to set up camp. We will not be safe from predators at night.”

“Fine,” said Clarke shortly, before turning on her heel and heading over to a small clearing. She dropped her bag on the ground and began rummaging through it for supplies for the night, refusing to look up as she heard Lexa do the same.

After they had set up their tent Lexa stoked a small fire, over which she cooked strips of meat for them to eat. They sat on opposite sides, eating their food in an uncomfortable silence, until Clarke couldn’t take it any longer.

“I’m sorry,” she said, making eye contact with Lexa for the first time in hours. “I shouldn’t have said your people are savages.”

“Don’t apologize if you believe it to be true.” It was not said with unkindness, but with a matter of fact tone that Clarke was quickly becoming used to when dealing with Lexa. It was infuriating mostly, but one small part of Clarke (a part that was getting increasingly harder to ignore) found it oddly endearing and so characteristically Lexa.

“I don’t,” Clarke insisted. “You’re right. My people have not gone out of their way to make connections with the other clans. That’s part of the reason I’m here. I want to change that.”

Clarke, who had expected Lexa to laugh at her unlikely goal like everyone else she told at the Ark, instead nodded solemnly, a small smile on her face.

“You were also not wrong,” said Lexa, much to Clarke’s continued surprise. “My people do reward violence. Brutality. All they have known is war, and what it takes to survive it. I wish one day to be able to give them something different. Something peaceful.”

Clarke’s breath caught in her throat as she saw the determination on Lexa’s face, her intensity making her shiver even from the opposite side of the fire. Before she could reply, Lexa seemed to snap back to herself and stood up quickly, kicking dirt on the fire to extinguish the flames.

“We should sleep Clarke. It will be an easier journey if we leave before the sun rises tomorrow.”

Clarke nodded and followed her inside their tent, feeling the exhaust from a day’s travel starting to press heavy behind her eyes. She knelt down on her side of the tent and went to pull blankets out of her bag when, to her sudden horror, she realized that there were none. She turned quickly to look back at Lexa and found her already spreading her own furs on the ground.

“Lexa, um, I think I’m missing…” Clarke faltered as Lexa looked up at her, “I don’t have any blankets,” she finished lamely.

Lexa shrugged indifferently, clearly not seeing the issue. “We can share, Clarke.”

Clarke didn’t move, conflicted about whether or not she could trust herself to be so close to Lexa without making a fool of herself. Noticing her hesitation, Lexa grinned and Clarke nearly fell over.

“I promise I won’t bite,” Lexa laughed. Clarke tried to laugh back, but it came out as more of a high-pitched groan. She blushed furiously and, before she could embarrass herself further, decided to bite the bullet and take Lexa’s invitation, clumsily pulling off her pieces of armor before sliding underneath the fur, making sure to position herself as far from the middle as she could.

A few moments later she felt Lexa lay down beside her. It was tempting. Clarke was forcing herself to breathe slowly, thinking about anything but how close their bodies must be to touching. She squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her fists together, willing sleep to come before her heart beat itself right out of her chest.

* * *

 

Lexa was running towards her, fear and blood covering her paint streaked face.

She knelt before Clarke, who was sprawled out on the dirty ground. Her breath was coming in short gasps, and she couldn’t seem to focus on anything around her. Lexa’s face came into view and she was sobbing, wrapping her arms around Clarke’s shoulders, stroking her face, pleading, shaking her, but for what Clarke didn’t know. She tried to touch her but her arms were too heavy, a buzzing noise starting to fill her ears and blacken her vision. Clarke knew that she was dying. But she didn’t want to go, not yet, not before she had a chance to touch Lexa, knowing that she wanted her more than anything she had ever wanted before. If she could just…move…her arm…

Clarke awoke with a small start to find herself on her back, staring up at the canopy of their tent. There was a slight tickling sensation against her left shoulder and when she turned her head it felt as if her heart had lodged itself in her throat.

Lexa was lying only millimeters away, the tip of her nose pressed lightly against Clarke’s shoulder so she could feel a soft puff of air every time she breathed out. The desire to touch the girl next to her was almost overwhelming. Clarke had nearly convinced herself to reach out when Lexa stirred suddenly, her eyebrows creasing as she pulled herself out of sleep.

Panicking, Clarke slammed her eyes shut and tried to slow down her breathing, praying that Lexa would not notice she had been awake only seconds ago. She felt Lexa stretch next to her and then abruptly freeze. Clarke was convinced that she could hear her heart thumping wildly in her chest. But then she felt her quickly move away, and heard her rummaging through her pack on the opposite side of the tent a few seconds later.

Clarke cautiously opened her eyes at the same moment that Lexa turned back around. They stared at each other for one awkward, tension filled moment, before Lexa broke the silence.

“Good morning, Clarke. We should head out, as soon as you’re ready.”

Clarke nodded, not trusting her voice, and they packed up their things in silence.

Some hours later, when Lexa went to go refill their canteens, Clarke was finally able to catch her breath. She sat down on a rock at the top of a bank that overlooked the river Lexa was kneeling in front of. The sun was almost to its highest point in the sky, and Clarke had long since shed her jacket and protective gloves, beads of sweat ever present along her hairline.

Clarke took a moment to enjoy her vantage point of Lexa. She had just finished filling up the last of their canteens and was stretching her arms high above her head when Clarke had to abruptly look away, her mind wandering to places that she couldn’t afford to indulge.

“Clarke!”

She jumped up and whipped her head around to where Lexa was, fearing she had suddenly been attacked by something in the water. When she saw that the other girl was not harmed, but kneeling next to the water with her nose inches from the surface, she grabbed her pack and walked over.

“Lexa, what—“

“Shh! You’ll scare him,” she hissed. “Look.”

Lexa slowly lowered her hand into the water and when she brought it back up, a small turtle was resting in the center of her palm. Clarke knelt down next to her, but she was not looking at the turtle. Instead she was staring at Lexa with a grin on her face, not believing that she was seeing this stoic, no nonsense warrior get excited about a tiny sea creature.

“I have only seen them in books,” Lexa whispered, running her finger along the top of the turtle’s shell. “But we do not have a name for them. Do you know what they are called Clarke?”

Clarke found it hard to ignore the swelling of adoration that blossomed in her chest, but she swallowed it down and let herself move slightly closer to Lexa.

“Turtles, I think. But I’ve never seen one either. All the rivers around the Ark are empty.”

“Turtle,” repeated Lexa slowly. She lowered it back into the water and watched it swim away, that small smile that Clarke loved lingering on her face. Clarke stared at her openly, unable to tear her eyes away from this new, innocent side of Lexa.

There was a sudden, ear-splitting roar from the trees behind them, and before Clarke could react, Lexa threw her arm around her waist and shoved them both forwards and into the river. The water was flowing steadily and Clarke felt herself smash painfully into Lexa as it carried them downstream.

When Clarke finally broke the surface for air, she cast a quick glance backwards and saw the largest creature she had ever seen, ripping aside trees and making the ground shake as it thundered after them. But the river was too fast and too wide, and Clarke found herself being hauled up onto the opposite shore, several kilometers from where they had been just moments ago.

“Lexa!” Clarke rushed over to her, the sight of the other girl’s arm drenched in blood driving all other thoughts out of her mind. But before she could reach her Lexa sprang to her feet and grabbed Clarke’s wrist, dragging her to her feet again.

“Not now Clarke- _run_!” Lexa shoved Clarke in front of her and they broke into a dead sprint, away from the river and into the dense tree line ahead. Every now and then Clarke would stumble over something on the forest floor, but Lexa was always right behind her, steadying her and keeping their pace consistent. After what seemed like several long minutes, Clarke felt Lexa grab her hand and tug. They gradually slowed to a stop, each panting heavily and soaking wet.

“Was that…?

“The _pauna_. Yes.” Lexa let go of Clarke’s hand and Clarke’s heart throbbed painfully at the lost contact. “We need to find a place to hide, before he picks our scent back up.”

A few moments later they found a shallow cave near the top of a high cliff. Lexa dropped heavily to the floor, and Clarke realized with a shock how pale she was.

“Lexa, your arm.” Clarke quickly knelt beside her and looked around frantically, cursing when she came to her next realization. “Fuck! The packs!”

Lexa nodded weakly. “I didn’t have time to grab them. They are still on the shore.” She winced as Clarke tried to take her arm to better assess the damage. “No, Clarke. You need to leave before it comes back. I will only slow you down.”

“I’m not _leaving_ you Lexa!” Clarke exclaimed.

“Clarke, you must! One of us dead is far better than the both of us!”

“ _No_.” Without waiting for a response, Clarke ripped off a strip of her shirt and pressed it to Lexa’s wound, trying to stop the bleeding.

“Clarke…”

“Lexa,” she said firmly, ”Please. You said you would protect me, and this is how I protect you. Let me help you.”

Lexa made a sound that Clarke could only describe as a growl, but she made no further attempts at stopping her from addressing her wound. Without any medical supplies, Clarke wrapped the wound as cleanly as she could from more strips of her shirt, but knew it would not hold for long.

“We need to get you real medical attention,” said Clarke, wincing at the worried shake she let slip in her voice. “I don’t even have anything to clean the wound with.”

“The nearest village is another day’s journey. Maybe farther. I don’t know how far off course the river took us.”

“Then I need to go back and get the packs.” Clarke stood, her mind made up. Lexa scrambled up after her. “It is too dangerous Clarke!”

“I’m not going to sit here and watch you bleed out!”

They stared at each other stubbornly until Lexa, lightheaded from blood loss and shouting, swayed dangerously and fell back against the wall. Clarke lunged forward and caught her before she hit the ground.

“I’m going Lexa. I’ll be fine; it’s not that far. And it’s closer than the village. It’s our best shot.”

“Then I’m going with you,” Lexa insisted, “It is too dangerous. The _pauna_ —“

“You can barely walk,” Clarke tried to reason. “Let alone cross that river.”

Lexa clenched her jaw. “This is foolish Clarke. You are risking your life for nothing.”

Clarke leaned forward. “Not nothing.”

She heard Lexa suck in a breath before she pressed her lips to the other girl’s temple, lingering a few more seconds than she needed to. She felt Lexa tilt her head up and Clarke was painfully tempted. But she forced herself to pull away, not missing the brief flash of disappointment on Lexa’s face.

“Don’t go anywhere,” Clarke whispered, and before she could change her mind, she sprinted out of the cave and back towards the _pauna_.


	4. The Pauna: Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! 
> 
> This chapter took me way longer than it should have. I apologize for the wait, but I spent a lot of time rewatching Clexa scenes to get their voices in my head, and I may have been distracted by the kiss once or twice...(or three or four).
> 
> Thank you again for all of your lovely comments! They really helped me tackle this writer's block that stubbornly refused to go away.
> 
> Anywho, hope you enjoy!

After retracing their steps to the cave, Clarke found herself back at the river. She stopped, taking a moment to breathe, and pulled out her gun. There had been no sign of the _pauna_ yet, but Clarke had a feeling it might have stayed on the other side of the river. Not wanting to cross the water just yet, she walked west along the bank as quickly and silently as she could until she saw the familiar lumps of their packs on the opposite shore, several meters away.

Clarke’s heart soared in relief and she sprinted forward, until she was directly across from their forgotten packs. But the water was deep and filled with sharp rocks, no doubt the source of Lexa’s wounded arm, so she walked farther on until she came to a shallower part of the river. Holstering her gun, Clarke pulled and shoved at a large trunk that had fallen over, gradually getting it closer to the water to make a crude bridge she could cross.

But the trunk was heavy and knarled, and it took Clarke much longer than she would have liked to make that final push into the river. With a great splash it tipped over into the shallow water and got wedged between two large boulders. Clarke collapsed on the ground in exhaustion, her hands raw and bloody from gripping the tree’s rough bark. Glancing up she saw the sun was much lower in the sky than when she started and a sharp pang of fear split through her chest. She fought through her fatigue and stood up on shaky feet, knowing that it would be almost impossible to find her way back to Lexa in the dark.

Clarke stepped gingerly on the log and it dipped dangerously, but supported her weight. She took several more quick steps and then stopped, swinging her arms wildly as she tried to balance on the middle of the trunk. Thankfully, she was able to stop wobbling and allowed herself a brief moment to catch her breath.

“Come on Clarke,” she muttered to herself. “Lexa is depending on you.”

With this thought in mind, Clarke took a great lunge forward and in another few steps dived forward onto the shore just as the log became dislodged and banged nosily down the river.

Clarke jumped to her feet and put a hand on her gun, her heart pounding as she listened for signs that the _pauna_ was approaching. She heard nothing but the sound of the sloshing water, but Clarke did not relax. The thick trees surrounding the river meant that the creature could be lurking somewhere just beyond her line of sight.

The packs were barely visible in the distance, and Clarke began to quickly make her way towards them. She was barely 20 paces away when there was a loud crunching sound and the trees to her left shook violently. The _pauna_ emerged slowly in the space between her and the packs and Clarke froze, fear spreading like goose bumps across her skin.

But it didn’t seem to notice her and lumbered down to the river, pausing to drink several handfuls of water. Clarke didn’t dare move, her mind racing as she tried to think of what to do. The beast was too close to the packs to reach them without it noticing her; she needed to distract it, draw it away from the packs.

Slowly, she stepped sideways towards the cover of the trees, keeping her eyes on the pauna and her right hand over her holstered gun. When she reached the safety of the forest she sprinted forward until she thought she should be directly behind the creature and then carefully walked back to the edge of the trees. To her relief Clarke saw she was not far off; it was still hunched over the water and oblivious to her stealthy approach.

Now was the time to make her move. Clarke crouched behind a fallen tree and drew her gun, resting her elbows on the trunk as she took aim. She knew she only had one shot, and that it needed to hit the pauna in a place that would distract it long enough for her to make the short run to scoop up the packs. She aimed for the chest, hoping to hit its lungs, and before she could talk herself out of it, squeezed the trigger.

Without checking to see if she hit her mark, Clarke dived behind the trunk and, once she heard the beast’s roar of anger, she charged forward, farther into the dense trees. The ground shook under her feet, a sign that the pauna had barreled into the forest towards the sound of her gun. Clarke immediately made a sharp right and now pelted towards the edge of the forest, stumbling and tripping over the uneven floor. Once she broke the tree line she saw the packs only a few paces down the river and ran to them, a great crunching sound shaking the air around her as she flung one over each shoulder without breaking her stride.

Chancing a glance back, Clarke saw the beast crash through the trees and, once it saw her, began its pursuit. Clarke pushed her burning legs to go faster but her pace had decreased with the added weight of the two packs on her back. She knew she couldn’t jump into the river again- the water would ruin the medical supplies and she couldn’t risk getting injured by the rocks like Lexa did. Knowing that the _pauna_ was gaining on her, she grabbed her gun and swung her right arm around, shooting wildly behind her in an attempt to slow it down. There was another roar of pain but Clarke didn’t dare look back as the end of the river came into view, dropping sharply over the edge of what appeared to be a waterfall.

Thinking fast, Clarke slowed slightly but kept running straight towards the ledge. She heard the creature getting closer and, at the last possible moment, leaped sideways to stay on even ground. The _pauna_ , not able to change direction as quickly, stumbled as it approached the waterfall, but its momentum was too great and it went tumbling over the edge.

The weight of the _pauna’s_ fall shook the ground and Clarke stumbled, her right foot sliding down the steep embankment. At the same moment that she slipped over the edge a strong hand grasped her arm and, with a surprising amount of strength, pulled her up and back onto even ground.

“Clarke!” Lexa dragged her towards her again, wanting her farther away from the waterfall’s edge. “Are you hurt?”

“No, I’m fine, but what-“

Before she could finish Lexa flung herself over the ledge and skidded down the bank, drawing her sword with her uninjured arm as she went.

“LEXA! What the fuck!” yelled Clarke and immediately followed suit, the packs bouncing noisily behind her. Just as she reached the bottom she fired two quick shots into the giant arm that was reaching for Lexa and then hastily looked away, her stomach clenching uncomfortably at the horrible squelching sound that came as Lexa delivered the fatal blow.

“It’s ok Clarke. You are safe.”

Clarke turned back to see Lexa’s face covered in splattered blood, the pauna laying still at her feet. “ARE YOU INSANE?!” she gritted and stalked up to Lexa, ignoring the sharp pains that shot all over her body. “How did you even- when did you- were you following me this whole time?”

“Yes,” said Lexa simply, and another wave of anger rose up in Clarke. But then Lexa breathed out heavily and dropped to her knees, her sword clattering to the floor.

* * *

 

Clarke had managed to drag Lexa over to the small lake that the waterfall dumped into. She had changed the makeshift bandage she had made for her earlier, wincing as she saw how soaked it was in blood. Lexa’s wound was clean and freshly wrapped now with the supplies from the packs, but she had yet to wake up. Her pulse was faint, but present, her face still pale from the blood she had lost.

“Damn it Lexa,” Clarke muttered to herself. If only she had stayed in the cave like Clarke told her to, she wouldn’t be in as bad of a position as she currently was. But Lexa had come, like Clarke had half expected her to, and very nearly pushed her body to its limits.

The last rays of light were beginning to sink behind the mountains, so Clarke went about the task of pitching their tent. She glanced nervously at the _pauna_ on the opposite side of the bank, but it remained motionless. If anything, it would provide a temporary cover for any other predators that wandered across their camp. It had not moved since Lexa had taken it down, but Clarke still had the irrational fear that she would wake up to find it alive and bearing down on her and an already near death Lexa.

Morning came before Lexa finally opened her eyes. Clarke sat up groggily from where she had been keeping watch outside the tent, her body aching and sore from the day before. She had not slept at all, instead peeking inside of the tent every few minutes to make sure Lexa was still breathing. After one more quick check, Clarke went down to the lake and splashed the cold water on her face. When she turned back around Lexa was standing (although rather shakily) outside the tent, her usual stoic expression in place.

Relief flooded through Clarke and she went to her in several quick strides. Before she could stop herself Clarke threw her arms around Lexa, hugging her tightly. “You’re ok,” she whispered. She felt Lexa stiffen for a moment, and then lightly wrap her arms around her waist.

“How’s your arm?” Clarke asked. It felt too good to be pressed up against Lexa so she pulled away quickly, trying to save some of her dignity.

“Hurts,” answered Lexa. Clarke ignored the thrill that shot down her spine from hearing the other girl’s voice. “I’m sorry that you had to take care of me,” she continued, looking genuinely ashamed.

“You don’t have to apologize Lexa. I’m your healer. It’s my job. Although I do wish you’d have trusted me to get the packs and stayed put,” said Clarke, glaring. “You lost a lot of blood.”

“I do trust you, Clarke. But it was a risk I was not willing to take. I will not let you die for me.”

Clarke sighed. This conversation was going nowhere. “Come on,” she said, turning back towards the lake. “I need to rebandage your arm.”

They both sat at the edge of the water and Clarke unwrapped Lexa’s old bandage. It was, like the rest of Lexa, covered in dried blood. “You should wash all that off before I put a new dressing on. Try not to get your wound wet though. The last thing we need is for it to get infected.”

Lexa nodded. “You should wash too.”

Clarke looked down at herself, a mixture of blood and dirt caking her arms and hands. “Right. You can go first. I’ll give you some privacy.”

“I do not mind.”

Lexa kicked off her boots and began unbuckling her many pieces of armor. Clarke stared for a second, conflicted (knowing that she had less than innocent intentions for wanting to stay) but then followed suit and pulled off her shoes. In case Lexa needed any help, she reasoned.

It turned out that Clarke wasn’t too far off. As Lexa lifted her arms to take off her shirt she winced, unable to hide her gasp of pain.

“Here, I got it,” said Clarke immediately and moved forward to help pull the shirt over Lexa’s head. She struggled to keep her expression neutral, but her heart stuttered wildly when her fingers skidded across the other girl’s arms.

“Thank you,” Lexa muttered. Clarke could have sworn she saw a blush on her face before she ducked her head down, busying herself with unclipping her ankle braces.

Clarke forced herself to keep her eyes firmly on the ground as they continued to undress. It wasn’t until she heard Lexa slowly get into the water that she allowed herself to look up. Lexa had her back turned to her, one arm held awkwardly over her head to keep her wound from getting wet, the other beginning to unwind the braids in her hair. Tearing her gaze away from the long tattoo Clarke saw running down her exposed back, she took the opportunity to quickly shed the rest of her clothes, grab a bar of soap from their packs, and slide into the water.

Lexa turned as she approached her, looking ashamed again.

“Could you help me, Clarke?” She gestured towards her half untangled braids. “It is difficult with one hand.”

“Yes,” Clarke breathed, a little more enthusiastic than she had intended. “I mean—yeah, sure, of course.”

Clarke moved forward as Lexa turned around again, and she was grateful that the other girl wouldn’t be able to see the blush that was warming her face. As she began to untangle her braids she felt Lexa shiver ever so slightly. Clarke didn’t dare let herself believe it was anything more than a result of the cold water.

“Thank you,” Lexa said quietly. “For saving my life. I do not want you to think I am ungrateful.”

Clarke, unable to help herself, ran her fingers through a newly untangled strand of hair. Lexa leaned back almost imperceptibly as she did, following her touch. “I’d feel bad if I let my Second die on our first assignment,” she said jokingly, trying to cut through the tension that had suddenly arose between them. “And I’m sure you’ll have plenty of opportunities to repay me.”

“I will not fail you Clarke.”

Clarke finished unbraiding her hair and, reluctantly, dropped her hands in the water. “I know Lexa,” she said, smiling fondly.

They scrubbed their skin in silence for the next few moments. Clarke determinedly kept her gaze from wandering below Lexa’s neck, who was making no effort to be modest about her body. When she began to make her way back to the shore Clarke waited, her back turned under the pretense of washing her hair, until she thought it was safe to follow. Lexa was clothed except for her shirt, which she kept off so Clarke could tend to her wound but (both to Clarke’s relief and disappointment) had her bindings covering her chest.

Feeling daring, Clarke climbed out of the water, not bothering to cover herself, and slowly went about wringing her hair dry. She was rewarded with a quickly averted gaze as Lexa suddenly became very interested in retying her boots.

“Let’s see the damage,” said Clarke, pulling on her shirt and grabbing a pack before she sat down next to Lexa. She grabbed a bottle of antiseptic and leaned closer, inspecting the wound. “It doesn’t look too deep. You won’t need stitches, but it’ll probably leave a scar.”

Lexa shrugged. “I have many. One more will not make much difference.” She looked up and Clarke’s breath caught in her throat.

“From what?”

“The life of a warrior is not an easy one.”

Clarke finished cleaning the wound and wrapped it up again. “There you go. That should be good enough until we get back to camp.” Lexa nodded and reached for her shirt, but Clarke grabbed it first. “Here, let me help.”

She moved closer and carefully maneuvered the shirt over Lexa’s head, making sure to avoid her freshly bandaged arm. As she pulled it over her stomach, Clarke’s fingers brushed against Lexa’s skin, her muscles jumping at the contact. She looked up and their eyes locked. They were much too close, and Clarke knew she should move away, but she couldn’t help her eyes from dropping to Lexa’s lips, closer than they had ever been to her own.

Throwing caution to the wind, Clarke closed the short distance between them and kissed her once, soft and chaste. She pulled away so their noses were lightly brushing, giving Lexa a chance to stop but the other girl responded immediately, surging forward to press their lips together again. It was desperate and gentle, and Clarke immediately became addicted to the taste of Lexa, the feel of her mouth moving against her own. But it was over as quickly as it started; Lexa jerked away with a sharp intake of breath.

“Clarke, I’m sorry I…” She looked away, refusing to meet Clarke’s eyes. “I’ve already promised myself to someone else.”

Clarke’s heart felt like it dropped somewhere in the region of her stomach. She stared, confused by the abrupt turn of events. “You…oh,” she said, feeling suddenly stupid.

“I’m sorry,” Lexa said again, looking genuinely conflicted. “I should have said something sooner. It’s…it is complicated, I don’t know how—“

“You don’t have to explain,” Clarke said quickly. She wanted desperately to be somewhere else, anywhere but near Lexa. “Really. I should have known.” The moment she spoke the words she knew they were true. It was obvious, but she didn’t want to believe it, wanted to hold on to the possibility that maybe she had been mistaken.

Lexa said nothing but continued to stare at her, her expression filled with regret and something that Clarke didn’t have the strength to decipher. The name hung thick and unspoken between them and Clarke felt like she would suffocate if she did not remove herself from Lexa’s proximity. Her lips still tingled from the kiss and she hated the way she ached to do it again.

“Clarke…”

“We should get ready to leave.” Clarke stood up, distracting herself from her embarrassment by shoving things unceremoniously into their packs. “I’ll take down the tent.” She turned on her heel and walked determinedly away, feeling Lexa’s eyes on her back.

Neither of them spoke as they made their way back to camp. Clarke purposefully walked several paces behind Lexa, who thankfully didn’t try to resume their previous conversation. Her face was still warm with shame, and she tried not to dwell on the fact that they still had eighteen months left together. Eighteen months of averted gazes, longing glances, and the knowledge that Lexa belonged to someone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe.
> 
> Assuming you don't hate me, feel free to follow me on tumblr at gamewriter47. I'm thinking of posting previews or updates if there is enough interest. Especially if the next chapters take me this long to get through.
> 
> I'm also looking for some artists to do a cover for this story, because that creepy gray silhouette is boring.  
> Message me if you are interested or know anyone who might be!
> 
> Until next time!


	5. Reunions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there!
> 
> Your comments/reviews were amazing this week. I appreciate each and every one immensely, and I am delighted that you are all enjoying the story. As a thank you, I've spent most of the last three days writing this next chapter for you. Please excuse any errors I might have missed as I was eager to get this to you guys as soon as I could.
> 
> Happy Wednesday!

They arrived back at camp in the early hours of the following morning.

Clarke trudged exhaustedly behind Lexa through the front gates, having endured another sleepless night. Sleeping so close to Lexa had been almost unbearable after what happened between them at the waterfall, even more so because of the fact that Lexa kept shooting her furtive glances every time she moved, as if she was afraid Clarke would try to kiss her again.

Clarke, on the other hand, spent the rest of their journey with her eyes firmly on the ground, determined to look at as little of Lexa as she could manage. The knowledge that the other girl was unattainable only made Clarke want her even more, and she silently chastised herself for her childish thoughts.

The camp was nearly deserted as they made their way to their tent. Lexa held open the flap for her, and Clarke collapsed immediately on her bed. She listened to Lexa move around the tent for a few moments, but before she knew it she was sprawled on her back, the tent quiet and dark around her.

Clarke sat up, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, and looked over at Lexa’s bed. It was empty, but she was not at all surprised. She probably went to see Costia, Clarke thought bitterly. Sure enough, there were sounds of celebrating and laughter coming from outside the tent. It seemed that most of the candidates had returned from their first task.

Not wanting to be alone with her thoughts for much longer, Clarke decided to go and try to find some of her friends from the Ark. Realizing she had fallen asleep with all of her armor on, she yanked off her shoulder guard with a little more force than she had intended and chucked it irreverently across the tent. It was much easier to be angry than heartbroken.

As Clarke made her way towards the hall, she couldn’t help but feel resentful towards the small groups of candidates she saw celebrating throughout the camp. Her and Lexa should be partaking in the festivities, having successfully completed their quest but, as usual, Lexa was nowhere to be found. Feeling significantly more irritable than she had before she left her tent, Clarke stalked into the open doors of the hall where Octavia immediately caught her eye.

“Clarke! Clarke!”

She looked over to see Octavia limping towards her, an excited grin on her face.

“Talk about an intense first day! How’d your quest go? We had to clear a village of a particularly aggressive pack of wolves. One of them got me in the leg, but Lincoln is really an amazing healer, he said I should be back on it in a couple days. Where’s your Second? Lexa, right?”

“Yeah, it was, um…” Clarke hesitated, slightly off put by Octavia’s barrage of questions. “It was fine. I’m going to meet Lexa now, actually, so…”

Octavia accepted her lie with an enthusiastic grin and limped back towards the small knot of people she had come from. Glancing over, Clarke saw Bellamy and Finn talking animatedly to Lincoln. All of them looked battered and bruised, deep cuts marring their faces but looking happy nonetheless. Clarke noticed with a pang of jealously that Costia was not among them.

Making her way to the table in the center of the hall that was piled high with food, Clarke began to load up her plate while she shot barely concealed glances across the crowd, searching for Lexa.

Much to Clarke’s surprise (and dismay) she actually did catch Lexa’s eye and, before she could look away, the other girl gestured her over. Not knowing what else to do, Clarke sulked forward, her apprehension only growing when she saw that Costia was seated next to Lexa.

“Clarke, how are you?” asked Lexa, meeting her halfway so they had some semblance of privacy, but the considerate gesture only served to increase Clarke’s irritation.

“Fine,” she answered shortly. “Don’t let me keep you. I was just leaving.”

“You haven’t eaten anything,” said Lexa, looking at Clarke’s untouched plate of food with a furrowed brow.

“I’m suddenly not hungry.”

“I think we should talk.”

“There’s nothing I want to talk about Lexa.”

“Clarke—“

“Don’t,” Clarke said warningly. “Just…leave me alone. Please.”

Lexa looked hurt but Clarke couldn’t bring herself to care, embarrassment and anger swirling in her head as she turned on her heel and hurried out of the hall. Clarke knew that she had no reason to be upset with Lexa, that she was being unfair and childish, but the thought of sitting there and watching her with Costia sent a painful ache through her body. As the cool night air washed over her, she had the sudden desire to do something reckless, and headed towards the far end of the camp.

The sounds of raucous celebrating grew louder as Clarke got further away from the hall. She turned down a far line of tents and immediately saw a large bonfire burning brightly, a crowd of about fifteen dancing and yelling around it.

Clarke walked towards the group but then stopped abruptly, having just seen what was staked on top of the bonfire. Her stomach flipped in disgust and she stepped backwards, wanting to get away, and ran straight into a boy much larger than herself, glaring down at her with cold eyes.

“Sorry, I didn’t see—“

“What are you doing here?” the boy asked gruffly. At the same moment that Clarke realized he was holding a long knife in one hand, he grabbed her tightly around her upper arm with the other and spun her around, pulling her forcefully towards the bonfire.

“What the hell are you doing?” shouted Clarke. She struggled to get free of the boy’s grasp, but he was much bigger and stronger than she was, and hardly seemed to notice.

As they came into the light of the bonfire, those closest to them stopped their celebrating and turned around to watch. Clarke noticed with a jolt that they were the same faces that had scowled at her from the Ice Nation table on her first day. They looked as unfriendly as ever- more so with the distinct flush of alcohol coloring their pale faces.

Clarke was suddenly pushed to the ground and the boy bowed low beside her. Looking up, Clarke saw the object of his reverence. A tall, severe looking woman stood up slowly from where she was seated and four large, brutish looking guards did the same, the light from the fire glinting menacingly off their weapons.

“ _Ai kwin_ , I found this girl spying among the eastern tents.”

“I wasn’t _spying_ ,” Clarke interjected irritably, “I didn’t even know anyone was over here!” She stared defiantly up at the woman standing over her, refusing to be intimidated. Her hair was as white as her pale skin but her eyes were dark and wild. Clarke couldn’t help but squirm uncomfortably, desperate to get away from this woman’s sharp gaze.

“Why did you leave the hall?” the woman asked, her voice colder and higher than Clarke had imagined. “Do you not wish to celebrate with the rest of them?”

“Not particularly. I wanted to find someone—somewhere else to go.”

The woman laughed, but it was hollow and sharp. “Well, why didn’t you say so! We never reject those who are looking for a place to belong. Come, stand up.” She swooped down and lifted Clarke up easily by her arm. The guards around her relaxed the hold on their weapons slightly, but still flanked the woman tightly as she led Clarke to a long table next to the fire.

She thrust a cup full of clear liquid into Clarke’s hand and took another one in her own, raising it between them in toast.

“To our new friend…” She paused, and Clarke hastily raised her cup to hers.

“Clarke. Of the Sky People.”

There was a flash of menace in the woman’s eyes before she laughed her icy laugh again, and it was gone. “To Clarke, who chose most wisely.”

The woman tossed back her head and drained her cup. Clarke did the same, the liquid burning her throat and making her cough in surprise.

“Our drink takes some getting used to.” She smiled, but it did not reach her eyes. “No doubt you will grow accustomed to it in time.”

There was an outburst of angry shouts and Clarke turned to see Lexa stalking towards her, sword drawn threateningly and a look of uncontrolled anger on her face.

“Clarke!” she roared. “We need to leave. Right now.”

“I don’t need you Lexa.” Her anger at the other girl flared up again. “I’m allowed to make my own choices.”

Lexa opened her mouth to argue but the woman next to Clarke stepped forward, her eyes narrowed in dislike.

“ _Leksa_ ,” she sneered. “I wondered if I’d have the displeasure of seeing you tonight.”

Lexa looked at her, as though just noticing she was there. “ _Nia_ ,” she growled, voice full of venom. “It seems I need to inform Indra the perimeter needs better protection. Vermin has still managed to sneak its way through.”

There was another eruption of outrage at Lexa’s words and Clarke jumped forward instinctively, serving as a barrier between Lexa and the woman’s guards.

“Lexa, please…” she hissed and put a hand on her shoulder, but the woman threw her cup to the ground and advanced towards them, her features contorted with anger.

“Know your place, _goufa_!”

“I am no child!” Lexa shouted back, pushing against Clarke’s hold on her. “And I do not answer to you! Nor will I ever.”

“It seems you still have not learned respect,” Nia said dangerously. “I am more than happy to teach you again. But I fail to see how my business with this girl has anything to do with you.”

“Clarke does not belong with you,” Lexa answered. She reached out and pulled Clarke gently behind her but kept her hand firmly on her arm, holding her close.

The woman laughed unkindly again. “And who does she belong with then, _Leksa_? You?”

Lexa’s jaw clenched, but she said nothing. The air was thick with tension. Clarke stepped forward, trying to diffuse the situation.

“Please, she’s just trying to look out for me. We’re Seconds, she only wants to—“

The minute Clarke spoke she knew she had said something she shouldn’t have. Nia’s eyes widened in delight and Lexa sucked in a quick breath behind her. The woman snapped her head towards Lexa, a triumphant smile on her face.

“Well, isn’t this an unexpected surprise.”

But why this was a surprise, Clarke did not find out as another surge of sound rang through the air. A group of warriors were hurrying towards them from the direction of the hall, alerted to their presence by the noise from earlier.

Nia glanced back at them, annoyance evident in her voice. “Looks like you are saved by Indra again. I can assure you that your luck will run out soon _Leksa_.”

“I do not need luck to kill you Nia,” Lexa scowled, “Just a reason. And I’m sure you will give me plenty of them before my time here is over.”

Before the woman could respond, Lexa grabbed Clarke’s wrist and marched her away from the bonfire and back towards the tents. When they were a safe distance away Lexa dropped her arm, rounding angrily on her.

“What were you thinking Clarke? Do you have any idea what could have happened if I hadn’t shown up?”

“What’s the big deal? I was just having a drink.”

Lexa exhaled impatiently, thrusting her sword aggressively into its sheath. “You were _just having a drink_ with the Ice Queen Clarke! You have no idea what she’s done, what she is capable of doing!”

“Then why don’t you enlighten me Lexa?” Clarke responded irritably. She was tired of feeling like everyone knew something she did not.

“You saw what they had in the middle of the fire? The bodies?”

Clarke’s stomach flipped again, remembering her first glimpse of the pyre. “Yes…”

“They were candidates, from the Ice Nation. They didn’t complete their first task so she burned them, and commanded her people to dance around their corpses.”

Clarke stared, her uneasiness increasing as Lexa continued.

“She comes to camp to recruit the young into her army. Now that she knows we are linked, she will try even harder to come after you.”

“Why?”

“Losing your Second is a great dishonor in my clan. I would not allow myself to continue if she claimed you. I could not.” Lexa’s voice broke. She looked like she wanted to say something else but as Clarke stepped forward she drew back. Clarke’s heart sank.

“Why does she want to hurt you Lexa?”

They had reached their tent and Clarke followed Lexa inside. She began to yank off her pieces of armor, her movements shaky and unfocused. It was the least in control Clarke had ever seen her.

“When I was younger…” Lexa started slowly. Clarke sat on her bed, watching her intently. When she began again, her voice was hard, factual. “The Ice Queen sent an army into my village. It was the middle of the night. Most were sleeping, defenseless. She had them set fire to the tents. More than half of our people were lost. My mother, father, sister…”

Lexa stopped and looked up at the canvas above them, her jaw tight. “If I had not been training with Indra in the forest that night, I would have been dead too. When word of the attack reached the rest of the Coalition they demanded answers. But she claimed that those who attacked us were not under her command, that they had gone rogue. She beheaded them for good measure and it was enough for the Coalition. But I knew better.”

Clarke took a step toward Lexa but stopped, hand outstretched, wanting to comfort her but not knowing if it would be welcome.

“I wanted my revenge,” Lexa ground out. Clarke dropped her hand. “But Indra advised me otherwise. Our village was devastated and the people would not survive retaliation, which would no doubt come if I went through with my attack. The Ice Queen is well connected among those who matter in the Coalition,” Lexa said bitterly. “My revenge would have led to nothing but death to more of those who did not deserve it.”

Lexa sat down heavily on her bed. Clarke sat down next to her and, after a second’s hesitation, put her hand over Lexa’s shaking one.

“I’m sorry,” she said quietly, her heart breaking for Lexa. “But if you never acted on your revenge, that still doesn’t explain why she’s coming after you.”

Lexa’s hand stiffened under hers and Clarke knew she had probed too far. Sure enough, Lexa stood up from the bed, her stoic mask slipping back into place.

“I need to speak with Indra. The Ice Queen should not have been able to get within our gates.”

“Lexa, wait—“ She reached out and grabbed her arm, forcing her to turn back towards her. “Talk to me, please. If someone is trying to hurt you, it affects me too.”

“Now you want to talk?” Lexa snapped, taking an aggressive step towards her. “You couldn’t seem to get rid of me fast enough earlier tonight.”

Clarke stood her ground but looked down, embarrassed. “I know. I’m sorry. I was being stupid. But I couldn’t…be there.” She hesitated, but the adrenaline lingering from their encounter with the Ice Queen had her feeling bold. “I didn’t want to watch her. With you.”

Lexa moved back, barely perceptible, but Clarke noticed. “I do not wish to speak of this Clarke.”

“Well I do.” Clarke stepped forward again and saw Lexa struggle to remain stationary. “Do you love her?” It came out softer than she had intended, but Lexa flinched as if she had yelled it at her.

Clarke, not expecting her to answer, was surprised as Lexa swallowed and looked at her openly. Clarke glimpsed another crack in her armor.

“I am very…fond of her,” Lexa started slowly, as if choosing each word carefully, “Our families are well respected in my village. It was assumed long before either of us was born that we would be bonded together. As I am now the last of my line, it is more important than ever.”

Clarke nodded, her heart dropping further than it had all night.

“But love…” Lexa continued, her voice becoming sharper. Clarke’s eyes snapped up to hers. “Love, I do not believe in. It makes people reckless and weak. I refuse to be either of those.”

“Love’s not something you can choose to believe in,” Clarke said incredulously. “It just…is.”

“Then I do not wish to have it,” said Lexa stubbornly.

“I don’t believe you,” retorted Clarke, equally as aggressive. “You kissed me back Lexa. Tell me there wasn’t a reason for that.”

Anger flashed across Lexa’s face, but she couldn’t stop her eyes from flitting briefly to Clarke’s mouth before she spoke. “You are infuriating,” she growled.

But Clarke continued as if she hadn’t spoken, moving well into Lexa’s personal space. It was exhilarating, being this close to her, intoxicating to feel the familiar pull that always drew her to Lexa; Clarke wouldn’t be able to back down now even if she wanted to.

“And if I kissed you again?” Clarke asked softly, not trusting her voice above a whisper. “What would you do?”

They were barely a foot apart now, but Clarke refused to be the one to give in again. She stared at Lexa evenly when, out of the corner of her eye, she saw Lexa slowly raise her hand and then felt her fingers brush lightly through her hair. Clarke let her eyes flutter closed, dizzy with expectation.

The entrance to their tent was suddenly yanked open and they jumped apart, whirling towards the sound of the intrusion. Indra stood there; breathing heavily and blood splatter on her face. Her eyes flicked between the two of them (Lexa had moved so her body was blocking Clarke, her sword already halfway out its cover) before she focused back on Lexa, her expression urgent.

“We need to speak,” she demanded, her voice hoarse. “Right now, _Leksa_.”

Lexa nodded and Indra turned on her heel to wait outside. With one last, lingering glance at Clarke, she fully unsheathed her sword and marched after Indra into camp.


	6. Repercussions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there!
> 
> I apologize for the wait, but I got it to you just in time for the weekend! This chapter has been pretty slow going. Hopefully the wait wasn't too terrible!
> 
> Just a quick note, I tend to write stories without a set outline and as a result, I don't really know what is going to happen until I am actually writing the chapter. Because of this I decided to tweak Clarke and Lexa's ages a bit, because it just seemed to make more sense as this chapter unfolded. SO Clarke = 17, Lexa = 18. It doesn't really change anything that's happened so far, but just in case you were curious!
> 
> Thanks and enjoy!

Clarke jerked awake at the sound of the tent opening, the awkward angle at which she had fallen asleep waiting for Lexa causing her to tumble ungracefully off the bed. Massaging her sore neck, she glanced up to see Lexa, exhaustion on her face and a slightly vacant look in her eyes. For a brief moment she saw that the sky outside was just beginning to lighten before Lexa let the flap fall shut behind her.

“You did not sleep,” Lexa stated. She did not move from where she stood, watching as Clarke clumsily pushed herself back on top of the bed.

“Not well.” She stifled a yawn behind her hand. “What happened?”

“The Ice Queen did not take kindly to being asked to leave camp. She seemed to think it was her right as much as anyone’s to evaluate those from her clan.” She dropped her still drawn sword to the floor and walked over to her bed, limping slightly. “I cannot say my presence helped to deescalate the situation. And Gustus…he…”

Her voice broke and Lexa slumped heavily on her bed. She stared down at her hands. Clarke followed her gaze and noticed with a start that they were shaking, covered in a thick layer of blood and dirt.

“Lexa…” she whispered, and immediately dropped to her knees in front of the other girl. “Did she…?”

Lexa nodded, eyes still on her hands, her voice mimicking Clarke’s hushed tones. “He was just trying to protect me.”

Something flickered in the back of Clarke’s mind, but she pushed it away to focus on mending Lexa. She got to her feet and went over to the jug of water in the corner of the tent, poured some into a bowl and grabbed a rag and some ointment from her medic bag.

Lexa watched as Clarke again knelt down in front of her and reached out for her hand, pausing just before they touched to look up at her, waiting for permission. She tilted her head forward and Clarke took her hand in hers, wetting the rag before beginning to gently scrub the grime from her palm.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Clarke said softly. She glanced up just in time to see Lexa’s features harden.

“There are things you don’t know about me Clarke.” She made to pull her hand out of Clarke’s grasp, but she held on tightly.

“You must be someone important,” Clarke said evenly, “I’ve seen the way people look at you- Gustus, Indra, the Ice Queen…Costia.” Clarke clenched her jaw, ignoring the spike of jealousy that shot through her. “She was trying to kill you, wasn’t she? When the Ice Queen attacked your village?”

Lexa considered her a moment, something looking like surprise seeping through her tired eyes. “Not me, specifically. The Commander, like all those before her, came from my village. She was visiting the night the Ice Queen attacked; she was the first to die.”

“Wait,” Clarke interrupted, “She killed the Commander, and the rest of the Coalition just…let her get away with it?”

“There had been unrest among the clans for some years under her rule. Talk of a rebellion was becoming louder each day. I don’t think anyone was too bothered to see her go.”

Clarke listened, her mind reeling as she aimlessly continued to scrub at Lexa’s hands. How had she never known this before? Were The Sky People even more isolated from the Coalition than she had initially thought?

“I was one of the few who survived,” Lexa continued. “But I was only fourteen. I do not believe she thought that the Commander’s spirit would choose someone so young.”

“The Commander’s…spirit?”

Lexa nodded. “I do not really understand it either, but…” She put a hand over her heart. “I can feel it. Once Indra realized, her and Gustus brought me here, to hide me from the Ice Queen until I was strong enough. Because of my predecessor, the influence of the Commander’s spirit could not match that of the Ice Queen. She has too many clans willing to do her bidding. Some vie for her to be the new head of the Coalition.”

“So why isn’t she?”

“Just because she has not claimed the title, does not mean she doesn’t have considerable power over the Coalition. She prefers to rule in secrecy; it lets her get away with things that a public figure would not be able to. I told you before that the Coalition is not as stable as it appears to be. The Ice Queen is the reason.”

“Do you think she knows? That you have the Commander’s spirit?”

“I think she has suspected for some time. But I believe last night we may have mistakenly tipped our hand. Gustus’ sacrifice for me did not go unnoticed.”

Clarke bit her lip, trying to process all this information as she began to spread ointment on Lexa’s cut up hands. “So what does that mean? What happens now?”

“I gave Indra my word I’d stay here until my training was completed,” Lexa answered, the resentment in her voice apparent. “I hate that I have not been able to lead my people. That I have been made to hide like a coward.” She yanked her dagger from her belt and plunged it angrily into the bedpost beside her. “But I respected her advice. I knew that without the support of all the clans, the Ice Queen would be able to overthrow me within a matter of months. I’d be no better a leader dead than I would be here. Now though, circumstances have changed.” She tugged her dagger easily out of the splintered wood. “I want to leave tomorrow. It is time I revealed myself to my people. I will not sit here and do nothing while the Ice Queen plots my death.”

“But Lexa,” Clarke interjected, “You just said that she’d overthrow you within months. How is that any better?”

“It does not matter now that she knows who I am. If I go or stay, she will try to kill me either way. At least this way I can try to rally the people against her before she realizes what is happening. It is not a great plan, I know, but at least it’s something.”

Clarke finished with the ointment and slowly screwed the lid back on the jar. She was worried, and not at all convinced that Lexa would be able to gather support against the Ice Queen. But there was something else. It was selfish, admittedly, but Clarke had to ask.

“And what about me?”

Lexa blinked, confused. “What do mean?”

“If you leave camp, what will happen to me? I can’t complete the program without a Second.”

“I’m sure the circumstances—“

“I want to go with you,” Clarke said abruptly. Before the words even left her mouth she could see Lexa getting ready to protest.

“I could not ask that of you Clarke.”

“You’re not asking. I’m offering.”

“I told you that I would not let you die for me,” Lexa insisted. Something in Clarke snapped. She was tired of saying things without really saying them, of skirting around whatever this was that had developed between them. She jumped suddenly to her feet, worry and exhaustion fueling her hasty anger.

“Why not?” Clarke demanded. “Am I not good enough for you, _Commander_?”

Lexa stared in surprise, caught off guard by the sudden switch in the tone of their conversation. “I didn’t—that’s not what I meant—“

“Then what do you mean Lexa? Tell me, for once, what you’re feeling. If you’re so insistent on riding off to your death tomorrow, the least you can do is tell me what the hell _this_ is,” she finished, gesturing between the two of them.

Clarke stared back steadily as Lexa looked at her, her expression unreadable. She clenched and unclenched her jaw several times, like she was fighting to keep the words inside her mouth. But Clarke’s patience was wearing thin, and she took her silence as answer enough.

“Fine,” Clarke said finally. “Then I won’t stop you.”

And with that, she spun on her heel and stalked out of the tent.

* * *

 

Clarke walked blindly through the camp, a mixture of anger and hurt buzzing in her veins. There was not as many candidates about as there usually were, but as she approached the center fountain she spotted a circle of people cheering and stomping wildly. As she got closer, she saw two people in the center of the crowd sparring furiously, their faces bruised and bloody but fiercely determined.

She spotted Octavia jumping and whooping at one edge of the circle, Lincoln staring at those in the middle with a quiet intensity beside her. They met each other’s eye and Octavia waved her over enthusiastically. Right when she settled herself beside them, the larger boy in the middle of the circle gave out a piercing yell and swung his sparring stick hard at his opponent, knocking him to the ground with a sickening thud. The crowd around them cheered as he spread his arms wide, a confident smirk on his face.

“Who wishes to fall by my hand next?” he roared.

Without hesitation, Clarke stepped forward and the crowd immediately hushed. The large boy looked at her, disbelief on his face. Clarke heard Octavia’s whispered _oh fuck_ from behind her.

“I do,” she declared, ignoring the few snorts of laughter from those watching the fight. She couldn’t blame them; their appearances were drastically opposite: the boy hulking and muscular, Clarke small and lanky.

“I think you may want to reconsider, _strik gada_ ,” the boy sneered. But Clarke ignored him, picking up his fallen opponent’s sparring stick.

“Afraid I’m going to embarrass you?” she asked calmly. Whether it was the lingering effects of her conversation with Lexa, Clarke felt strong, determined, and perhaps a little careless. But she had seen the boy that she challenged to fight before. No doubt he was strong but he was not smart, and his immense size slowed him down considerably.

The boy seethed at her taunt and lunged forward, swinging his stick wildly. Clarke dodged him easily before spinning on her heel and striking him hard on the back of his knee. He stumbled forward but recovered quickly, turning to face her again.

This time Clarke attacked first and shoved her stick forwards, trying to catch him in the shoulder. But he moved faster than she had anticipated and sidestepped her strike before hitting her hard in the side. The breath surged from her lungs but she managed to stay upright.

After he struck her twice more on the shoulder and Clarke had landed another one to his kidney, the boy lunged again. But this time Clarke was ready and she swung her stick to parry his blow, following up with another jab to his knee cap, this time the hit landing as he stumbled to the floor.

Clarke could hear Octavia cursing and cheering loudly behind her and she turned to give her a confident grin. But as she did a flash of deep red caught her eye and she faltered, finding Lexa staring furiously back at her from the crowd.

This second of distraction cost Clarke. She watched as Lexa’s eyes widened and there was a painful blow to the side of her head. She stumbled forward, lights popping in her eyes, and as she hit the ground noise erupted from around her.

Fighting back unconsciousness, Clarke raised her head in time to see Lexa run forward and tackle the boy in the ring. She had him on his back in seconds, Clarke’s discarded stick shoved against his throat.

“COWARD!” roared Lexa, pressing harder. “You would attack her when her back is turned!”

Clarke scrambled to her feet and pulled desperately at Lexa’s arms. “Lexa stop! You’re suffocating him!”

“He’d deserve it!” she growled, but released her grip and got to her feet. The boy gasped for breath and rolled over, clutching his neck.

Forgetting that they were still surrounded by a ring of people, Clarke grabbed Lexa’s arm and turned her roughly around. “What the hell do you think you’re doing Lexa? This is _my_ fight!”

“He was fighting dishonorably Clarke!” she said incredulously. “He nearly knocked you unconscious!”

“I don’t care,” Clarke hissed. “I don’t need you to protect me!”

Brain still foggy with misplaced anger and the previous blow to the head, Clarke snatched up the boy’s sparring stick and pointed it at Lexa. “Since you took it upon yourself to interrupt my fight, now you get to finish it.”

Lexa stared at her, expression blank. “I’m not going to fight you Clarke.”

Rage flashed through her and she gripped the stick tighter. “Why not?”

“Because you will lose.”

Clarke threw her stick furiously to the ground and stalked right up into Lexa’s personal space, shoving her hard when they were only a foot apart. Lexa stumbled back a few steps in surprise, glaring at Clarke in a way that would have scared her if she hadn’t been so angry.

The crowd around them was becoming noisy again, taunts being thrown at Lexa for not wanting to challenge Clarke. Lexa’s eyes darted to the people around her before landing back on Clarke, her impassive mask in place again.

“Fine,” she growled. “If you want to be a _branwada_ I won’t stop you.” She shoved past Clarke to stand at the opposite end of the ring, kicking Clarke’s stick over to her as she passed. The people roared with approval at the prospect of another fight and Clarke bent down to retrieve her stick, a trickle of fear seeping into her chest.

Lexa settled into her fighting stance and stared hard at her, waiting. Clarke knew that the other girl would not make the first move so, pushing aside the rational part of her mind, lunged forward.

Lexa blocked her attacks easily, a smirk barely visible on her face. She was much quicker and precise than her previous opponent, and Clarke found her swings getting sloppier as her frustration grew. Lexa kept deflecting her with an almost bored expression on her face, but refused to counter any of her attacks.

“Hit me back!” Clarke yelled. She wanted to get some sort of reaction from Lexa, something other than the condescending look she regarded her with now.

“I do not fight children,” Lexa answered smoothly, and the crowd roared in laughter around them.

Clarke surged forward with a renewed anger, swinging at Lexa with such fury that her cocky smirk faltered on her face and she had to shove her backwards before sweeping her stick behind Clarke’s ankles, making her fall hard on her back.

“ _Enough_!” Lexa spat dangerously. She towered over Clarke, knees on either side of her waist and her sparring stick held threateningly at her throat. “I know you are upset,” she continued lowering her voice so only Clarke could hear. “But I will not participate in your desire to get yourself hurt. If you wish to talk to me like an _adult_ , you come find me.”

Lexa straightened up and tossed her stick aside, giving Clarke one last glare before she stalked away, shoving the people surrounding them aside with several shouted curses.

* * *

 

Clarke walked around the camp miserably, body aching and ego bruised. She kept her eyes on the ground, too embarrassed to meet anyone’s gaze in case they had witnessed her, admittedly, (now that she had the gift of hindsight) foolish display in the sparring ring.

She had not yet mustered up the strength to see Lexa, but as she stopped and looked at the rapidly darkening sky, she knew that she could not wander around forever. Shoving her hands into her pockets, she turned and slowly made her way back to their tent. She had not gone to dinner, her appetite shot from sadness and humiliation, and as she passed the smell of food wafting out from the hall, her stomach clenched uneasily.

When Clarke finally reached the tent she held her breath and pushed the flap aside, but released it immediately in relief when she saw Lexa was not inside. Shucking off her jacket and boots, Clarke fell forward on her bed, drained. As she closed her eyes, trying to put an end to her terrible day, the relief she had felt just moments before was replaced with that familiar mixture of longing and jealously and her eyes opened wearily again.

It was late, and Lexa was not back. The memory of Lexa and Costia sitting next to each other on the fountain flashed into Clarke’s mind and she couldn’t stop the bitter thoughts that ran through her head. No doubt that’s where Lexa was now. Walking Costia back to her tent, kissing her goodnight, maybe even following her back inside…

Clarke’s chest ached and she rolled onto her back, eyes pressed to her face as she willed her thoughts of Lexa to go away.

When Clarke opened her eyes next it was to a much darker tent. She had moved back onto her stomach in sleep and pushed herself up gingerly, her sore muscles straining in protest. She looked over at Lexa’s bed and stopped, heart pounding.

It was empty. She sat up fully now and walked over to Lexa’s side of the tent. It was undisturbed, and Clarke’s heart sank a little further when she realized the other girl had not come back since she fell asleep.

But there was something else. As her sluggish mind pulled slowly out of sleep and her eyes adjusted to the darkness around her, she noticed that the air seemed thicker than usual. And that smell…

Clarke opened the flap of their tent. She sucked in a surprised breath and immediately began to cough, throwing her left arm over her suddenly stinging eyes.

The air was so thick with smoke that Clarke could barely see a couple feet in front of her. There were muffled screams and the unmistakable crackle of fire. She heard people running and fighting around her, but could only make out indistinct figures moving rapidly through the smoke.

Suddenly the reason for Lexa’s absence was clear. The camp was under attack.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on tumblr at gamewriter47 for updates on when the next chapter will be posted!
> 
> Looking forward to reading your guys' thoughts on this one! And we are gonna earn our M rating on the next chapter ;)  
> Have a great weekend :)
> 
> Translations:  
> strik gada - little girl
> 
> branwada - fool


	7. Fire and Ice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! This one got away from me a little bit. 
> 
> It's a bit longer though, so enjoy!

Thinking fast, Clarke ran back into the tent and grabbed her medic pack and gun, and then leaped back out into the chaos around her. Crouching low, she made her way towards the center of camp, where most of the noise seemed to be coming from.

When she reached the fountain, the air was thinner and she picked up her pace, sprinting towards the cluster of abandoned weapon stalls, when her feet suddenly hit something large on the ground and she tripped, landing flat on her face in the hard dirt.

“Fuck,” Clarke groaned, rubbing her face where she hit the ground. She looked back to see what she had fallen over and her heart dropped painfully. A girl with long, braided brown hair lay motionless on the ground, a thin pool of blood around her torso.

“Lex—“ But she couldn’t bring herself to finish and instead scrambled forward, turning the girl over with a sound that was a half sob and half cry of relief. She checked the girl for a pulse and the sense of relief vanished as quickly as it had appeared. People were being killed. Murdered. And Clarke had a sinking feeling that she knew why they were here.

Tearing her eyes away from the dead girl, she drew her gun and headed towards the hall, heart pounding every time she heard someone scream from around her. The smoke around her kept playing tricks on her eyes, and every so often she could swear she saw the red flash of Lexa’s shoulder guard, the swish of Octavia’s long dark hair. Every motionless body she stumbled over was the pale face of one of her friends before the vision dissolved into the unknown features of a candidate she had seen once at dinner, or had passed briefly among the weapon stalls.

Clarke breathed raggedly as the hall came into view. Her lungs burned with smoke and she coughed as the left entrance collapsed, sending up a wave of dust and smoke. As the air cleared she saw a cluster of people fighting furiously while dodging around burning bits of debris. With a pang, Clarke remembered that it was the spot where she had first met Lexa and she sprinted forward, a pull inside of her chest telling her that’s where she needed to go.

Before she could get more than a few steps, something large and heavy slammed into her from nowhere, sending Clarke sprawling to the ground, gun skidding wildly out of her grasp. The next moment someone flung themselves on top of her, pinning her underneath them as their hands went to her throat, squeezing slowly.

Clarke struggled frantically, gasping for breath as the boy she now recognized from the Ice Queen’s bonfire tightened his grip.

“You will not interfere,” he rasped. Clarke’s hands moved wildly as she searched for something to defend herself with. When her knuckles scraped against the sharp point of a rock she grasped it and swung hard at the boy’s head.

She missed her mark, hitting him in the jaw instead, but the surprise of the blow knocked him off balance and she was able to push him off, aiming another kick to his head as she dived toward her dropped gun.

Clarke’s fingers closed around the cool metal at the same time that her attacker grabbed her ankle and dragged her backwards. She spun around and tried to aim her gun at him but he hit her hard in the stomach, knocking the wind forcefully from her lungs.

This time Clarke really did see a flash of red as Lexa seemed to come from nowhere again, kicking the boy away from her and slicing her sword across his throat in one quick movement. Before his body hit the floor Lexa was rushing over, pulling up Clarke with one arm while the other kept her sword tightly in hand.

“Are you hurt?” she asked loudly, eyes scanning quickly over her body. They had to shout now, the roar of the fire and the yells and bangs of fighting growing steadily in volume around them.

Clarke shook her head and put her hands on Lexa’s face at the same moment the other girl threaded her fingers in her hair. “Is it the Ice Queen?” Her voice trembled and she reflexively pulled Lexa closer, body shaking with the effort of not saying all the things she wanted to before it was too late.

Lexa nodded and Clarke moved her hands to her waist, but she flinched away from her in pain.

“You’re hurt!”

“It doesn’t matter.”

The camp was erupting around them and Clarke could see a wall in the distance crumble as a new wave of warriors forced their way into the grounds. The reason for their destruction, she knew, was standing right in front of her, clutching to Clarke as desperately as she was holding on to her.

“I have to go,” Lexa whispered brokenly. Clarke shook her head furiously, pulling her so close their foreheads pressed together.

“You can’t Lexa,” she pleaded. “She’ll kill you. We can think of something else.”

“There’s too many of them Clarke. We cannot win. She will spare the camp if I surrender.”

“What if we run? She won’t know. We can go into hiding. I can—“

“I can’t let any more of my people die to protect me.”

Clarke was crying now, grasping Lexa like she could disappear at any second. Lexa held on just as tightly, eyes pained and watery as she tried in vain to wipe away the stream of tears running down Clarke’s face.

“Lexa, please.” She had to know. She had to understand. “You’re the only one…the only person I’ve ever…“

“I know,” she said softly, her voice rising as her breath hitched. “I know Clarke.” She leaned forward and kissed her cheek, lingering as her nose brushed the soft skin of Clarke’s face. “Stay alive for me.”

Lexa made to move out of Clarke’s arms but, as if changing her mind, reached out and seized her a moment later, their bodies knocking together. The kiss was rough and frenzied and Clarke was sure she’d have bruises from Lexa’s teeth on her bottom lip, but she kissed her back with equal fervor, hands clutching to her face and hair and she never wanted it to end.

But Lexa pulled away with a barely stifled sob that broke Clarke’s heart in two, and when she opened her eyes Lexa was gone.

It took only a second for Clarke to spot her running towards the front gates and she didn’t think twice before scooping up her gun and going after her. She zigzagged between those still fighting, struggling to keep Lexa in view through the smoke.

Another explosion rocked the ground underneath her and Clarke felt herself thrown forward by the force of the blast. When she managed to get to her feet Lexa was nowhere to be found, the camp ablaze in every direction, and a suffocating wave of panic squeezed around her chest.

Forcing herself to focus, Clarke regained her bearings and sprinted towards where she hoped Lexa had gone. When she skidded around a large, smoking pile of debris, her heart dropped and she couldn’t stop the strangled scream that came out of her mouth.

Lexa and the Ice Queen turned to look at her at the same moment. An elated laugh came from the Ice Queen, who had her sword pressed to the back of Lexa’s neck. Lexa, being forced to kneel at her feet by two large men, jerked towards Clarke at the sound of her voice, a horrified look on her face.

“Clarke! How nice of you to join us!” The Ice Queen lifted her sword from Lexa’s neck with a flourish and Lexa gasped in pain at the thin cut left by its blade. One of the large men left her side to grab Clarke roughly by the arm, dragging her over to stand beside the Ice Queen.

“I think you have been holding out on me Clarke,” she said conversationally, “You and _Leksa_ are more than just Seconds, are you not?”

Clarke ignored her, mind racing as she tried to figure out how to get them out of this mess, until the man holding her gave her arm a sharp pull backwards. Clarke yelped in pain and the Ice Queen yanked her chin up so she was forced to look in her eyes, glinting evilly in the light of the fire.

“It is polite to answer someone when they ask you a question.” Her grip on Clarke’s chin tightened; she could feel her long fingernails digging into her skin.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Clarke rasped. She was released with a bitter laugh. Her gaze went automatically back to Lexa, who was struggling futilely against her captor’s grasp.

“It does not matter,” the Ice Queen continued. She too turned her attention back towards Lexa, who stilled immediately, a vicious anger in her eyes. “Either way, I shall have her head before the night ends.”

The man holding Clarke adjusted behind her, releasing her arm but pressing a short knife to her neck. He dragged her backwards several steps, leaving the Ice Queen and Lexa, who was now being hauled to her feet, in the center of the clearing.

“Give her a sword,” the Ice Queen commanded. She drew her own blade again as she continued. The man holding Lexa hesitated.

“ _Ai kwin_ , I have seen her fight, I do not think—“

“ _SHOF OP_!” the Ice Queen bellowed. She brandished her sword threateningly. “She will not try anything while we have the girl. Do as I say, or it will be your head I collect next!”

The violence in her dark eyes was terrifying, and Clarke did not blame the man for shoving Lexa away from him, his sword thrown hastily at her feet.

“Pick up the blade,” she commanded, her voice getting colder as she looked at Lexa. Lexa hesitated, eyes flicking fast between Clarke and the Ice Queen.

“You came for me, Nia,” Lexa said. Her voice was strong, but she swayed slightly as she took a step forward. “Leave Clarke out of this.”

“I am not one to pass up an opportunity when it so willingly presents itself to me.” She smiled, but it only made her look more vicious. “Now, do as I say.”

Clarke saw the Ice Queen flick her sword and she let out a small gasp of pain as the man behind her pressed the knife harder against her throat. She felt the point pierce her skin and Lexa roared in anger.

Before Clarke knew what was happening, Lexa grabbed the sword at her feet and lunged at the Ice Queen. She watched in terror as they traded blows; it would have been an equal match had Lexa not already been injured, and Clarke struggled against the man’s hold as she saw Lexa’s hits beginning to miss, her feet stumbling as she dodged the Ice Queen’s attacks with increasing difficulty.

“You can do better than that _Leksa_!” the Ice Queen taunted. She maneuvered easily around Lexa’s next swing and jumped forward, knocking her shoulder hard against Lexa’s side, who staggered several steps back in pain. “Are the stakes not high enough for you yet, _goufa_? There is no one left to die for you now!”

“STOP!” Clarke pleaded, fighting so hard against the man holding her that he had to redouble his grip. “She’s hurt! Please! Let me fight for her, I’ll take her place!”

“Clarke, no!” Lexa was becoming increasingly pale, her hand pressed to her side but Clarke’s shout seemed to give her a boost of strength and she kept fighting, eventually managing to land a blow to the side of the Ice Queen’s head. The woman screamed in fury and slashed her sword across Lexa’s leg; she fell to her knees before her.

Then several things happened at once. Clarke watched, as if in slow motion, as the Ice Queen plunged her sword straight through Lexa’s shoulder. In the same second the camp exploded around them for the second time that night. Clarke found herself sprawled on the ground, screams and war cries seeming to come from every direction.

But only one image clouded Clarke’s mind and she stumbled forward. Blood was dripping into her eye but she wiped it away impatiently as she looked frantically for the spot where Lexa fell.

Finally, she found that flash of red and darted forward, dropping to her knees next to Lexa’s motionless body.

“No, no, Lexa please…” She pressed her fingers to Lexa’s neck, trying to feel for a pulse underneath her shaking hands. She almost collapsed with relief when she felt it. It was faint, but there nonetheless, beating feebly against her fingers.

“It’s ok Lexa,” Clarke murmured, although she knew she couldn’t hear her. “You’re going to be ok.” She ran her hands over Lexa’s body, trying to find where to stop the bleeding, but there was so much blood and dirt covering the girl’s body it was impossible to find where it came from.

There was another rattling explosion and Clarke threw her body over Lexa’s, trying to shield her from the debris raining down on them. When the air cleared, Clarke lifted her head to see streams of warriors running through the camp: reinforcements had arrived.

“Indra!” Clarke yelled as the familiar face came into view. “Indra, it’s Lexa, she needs—“

But Indra ran over without a word, easily scooping up Lexa in her arms. Clarke noticed with a pang how small and fragile she looked.

“ _Klark_ , come!”

She ran along behind her as they wove in and out of the crumbling camp, their destination becoming clear as they reached a cluster of makeshift medic tents. Several people were running about, darting between rows of patients lying on blankets spread on the ground. Indra set Lexa down on the nearest one, shouting out to a passing healer who began working on Lexa at once.

“I want to help,” Clarke said immediately, and made to kneel next to Lexa but Indra pulled her back to her feet.

“You need to come with me.”

“You don’t understand, the Ice Queen—”

“I am aware, _Klark_. We have managed to drive her and her forces out of camp. But I need to speak with you. Privately. It concerns _Leksa_. She will be safe,” she added, seeing Clarke’s hesitation.

Clarke reluctantly nodded and followed Indra into a nearby tent, one of the few that remained standing through the Ice Queen’s attack.

“How much did she tell you?” Indra asked abruptly. Clarke stuttered a few steps backwards, surprised by the fire in her eyes.

“She…she told me she was the Commander. And that the Ice Queen wanted to kill her.”

“Foolish girl!” Indra spat. She growled and began pacing angrily, hand clenching the hilt of her sword.

Clarke stood frozen, unsure if she was in danger of being slashed by the older woman’s blade. “She trusts me,” Clarke said cautiously, “I’d never do anything to hurt her, Indra. I swear.”

“She barely knows you. And you her,” Indra said sharply. “She may have the Commander’s spirit, but she is still a teenage girl who makes decisions with her heart first, not her head.”

“Is that such a bad thing?” Clarke asked quietly. Indra’s glare answered her question for her.

“ _Leksa_ still has much to learn. She is not ready. There is no doubt now that the Ice Queen knows. We must adjust our plans accordingly. As you were her Second, I wanted to inform you first. She cannot stay here.”

Clarke swallowed thickly, panic rising in her chest. She didn’t miss Indra’s use of the past tense. “I think she is ready,” she said, her shaking voice betraying her, “Lexa is smart. She’s passionate and caring, and she—”

“You know of Costia?” Indra interrupted bluntly.

Clarke’s heart plummeted. She felt shame burning her cheeks.

“I—yes, of course. Lexa, she…told me…”

“Then you know she cannot be what you desire of her. _Leksa_ must be whatever it is her people need her to be. She belongs to them first.”

“What about what Lexa wants? What about what makes her happy?”

“An effective leader can not afford either of those luxuries.”

“I care about her.”

“Then you will let her go.”

Clarke stopped, Indra’s command hitting her like a brick to the chest. Let her go? Her eyes stung as she dropped her gaze to the floor. “I don’t…think I can.”

Indra put a hand on her shoulder and Clarke was surprised to hear a hint of softness in her voice. “You must _Klark_. The Ice Queen is no idle threat. _Leksa_ cannot afford to have any distractions as we move forward.”

Without waiting for a response, Indra squeezed her shoulder and then swept out of the tent. Clarke kept her eyes on the ground, unable to move, her emotions whirling inside of her. Of course she wanted Lexa to be safe, and the Ice Queen had no doubt proved how formidable an enemy she could be. There was no question that Lexa needed to prepare to take up her rightful role as the Commander of the Coalition, but why did that mean that Clarke couldn’t go with her?

 _Would she even want you to?_ a voice in the back of her head asked. But no, Lexa had kissed her. That had to mean something. _Adrenaline? She was running off to a near certain death. And what about Costia?_

Clarke shook her head, ignoring the pricks of doubt and pain these thoughts sent through her chest. They’d cross that bridge when they got there. For now, Clarke just needed to make sure Lexa survived the night.

* * *

 

When Clarke found Lexa again she was still unconscious, but her skin was cleaned of blood and dirt, her shoulder, ribs, and left leg wrapped in bandages. Her face and what she could see of her arms were covered in bruises and cuts, but her chest was rising and falling reassuringly, eyes flicking back and forth behind closed eyelids.

Clarke kneeled down beside her and bowed her head, allowing a few tears that had been trying so desperately to escape slide silently down her face. She reached out and touched Lexa’s face softly, the warmth of the other girl’s skin easing the knot of anxiety that had been painfully growing in her stomach since the night began.

The camp was unnaturally silent despite the number of people (wounded and healers alike) that were present, the latter focused on mending as much of the former as they could. A row of bodies lay reverently along the far side of the medic tents, and Clarke couldn’t bear to look, sure that she had stumbled over some of their lifeless bodies in her haste to find Lexa.

Indra passed by a few times as Clarke sat next to Lexa. She gave her a stern look but Clarke returned it just as stubbornly. She refused to leave Lexa’s side, the soft thump of her heart soothing Clarke like she knew nothing else would. On the fourth pass Indra resolutely looked away but allowed her to stay, and Clarke let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding.

The next time Clarke opened her eyes it was morning and she was sprawled out on the dirt ground, her left hand gripping Lexa’s tightly. She looked around to see healers still moving between their various patients, but noticed with a jolt that the row of deceased bodies had grown slightly longer in the night.

Noticing that Lexa’s bandages had yet to be changed, Clarke got up and grabbed some supplies from the nearby tent. When she returned, she was so focused on taking care of Lexa that she didn’t know someone had approached them until she heard the tentative clearing of a throat above her.

“You’re _Klark_.”

Clarke looked up and immediately pulled her hands away from where they were touching Lexa, feeling as though she had just been caught doing something forbidden. Maybe she had been.

“Yes, um…Costia right?” Like she didn’t know. “Sorry I was just changing her bandages. You probably want to see her, I can leave.”

But Costia shook her head. “I came to see you actually. _Leksa_ has told me about you.”

Clarke stood slowly, suddenly nervous. “Oh. Um, right. She’s told me about you too. Listen, I didn’t mean to—”

“That’s not what I came here for,” she interrupted. Clarke couldn’t help but notice how similar her voice sounded to Lexa’s. “I know her. Better than she’d like to believe.” Costia hesitated, like she was regretting her next words as she said them. “When she wakes, she will refuse treatment. Do not listen to her. She is stubborn and does not like to show weakness.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed,” Clarke scoffed. She looked down at Lexa, and couldn’t help the affectionate smile that spread across her face.

“Right, well…” Costia started awkwardly. Clarke looked back up quickly, embarrassed. “Finn and I are leaving for a quest tonight. Tell her I said goodbye?”

“Of course.”

“And _Klark_...” She looked down for a brief moment, but when her gaze returned to Clarke’s it was confident and determined. “Take care of her.”

Clarke nodded, still caught off guard by their abrupt interaction. But by the time she pulled herself together, Costia was gone.

* * *

 

Over the next few days, Clarke helped in rebuilding the camp to something once again inhabitable. She was relieved to find out that none of her friends had fallen in the Ice Queen’s attack; Bellamy had a broken arm and Octavia a fractured ankle, but none had suffered more casualties than those from Lexa’s clan. Nearly half had been killed, the others lying among the wounded beneath the medic tents.

The seventh day after the attack, Clarke was walking back from the half-reconstructed hall, staring up thoughtfully at the stars above her. Her feet had tread this path to the medic tents so often over the last few days that she was hardly aware of her surroundings until a startling familiar voice called her name.

Lexa stepped out of the shadows, her arm in a sling and face still bruised, but Clarke swore she had never seen someone so beautiful. She stood frozen as Lexa approached her, shock and overwhelming relief at the sound of the girl’s voice rendering her feet useless.

“Lexa,” she breathed, and her body seemed to deflate at the sound of the name she had spoken so rarely over the last week. But her medical training caught up with her soon after, and she looked at Lexa sternly. “Why are you out of bed? Lexa, you shouldn’t be walking around so soon after—”

“I know,” she interjected, looking sheepish. “But I just wanted to see…I just wanted to make sure you were alright.”

Clarke melted and the urge to touch Lexa, to make sure she was real and alive and breathing was overbearing. She moved forward but Lexa stepped back and looked away. Clarke stopped, suddenly unsure and more than a little hurt.

“Costia told me to tell you goodbye,” Clarke said, trying to guess at the source of Lexa’s distance. “She said you told her about me.”

Lexa nodded, but still didn’t look at her. “I did. I care for Costia a great deal, but the truth is we had outgrown each other a long time ago. She knew it as well as I did.”

“So what does that mean?” Clarke asked quietly. She hated the small bubble of hope that swelled in her chest.

Lexa looked at her finally, face impassive and eyes hard, and she felt herself deflate, guessing her next words before she spoke them. “It does not mean anything. I will be leaving camp as soon as I am well enough to travel. There is much that needs to be done.”

“I want to come with you.”

“It is too dangerous—”

“Have I not proven myself enough to you already?” Clarke interjected angrily.

“It is not about proving your worth,” Lexa explained. “You have a chance for a life, one that is not full of death and loss. A war is coming, Clarke. I could not forgive myself if I let you follow me into it.”

“I don’t care about the circumstances.” Clarke closed the small distance between them and placed her hand over Lexa’s chest, the girl’s quickening heartbeat giving her confidence. “I want to be with you Lexa.”

Lexa let out a shaky breath, her body leaning into Clarke’s unconsciously. “And I you, Clarke. But I must be the Commander now. And the Commander cannot afford to have desires.”

“Says who?” Clarke slid her hand up to Lexa’s neck, moving so close that they were sharing the same breath.

“Clarke, please.” She could feel Lexa’s body shaking as she fought against melting into her touch. “I will be gone by the end of the next week. I do not think I could stay away if I allowed myself to have you.”

“Then take me with you.”

But Lexa shook her head and pushed her away, holding her at arm’s length with a burst of renewed resolve. “You are too good for the path I’ve been chosen to follow. I mean it, Clarke. I must do this alone.”

Clarke clenched her teeth, the amount of stubbornness the girl across from her possessed angering her as much as it set a fire low in her stomach. Her thoughts must have shown on her face because Lexa inhaled sharply, eyes darting once to her lips before she quickly stepped back, a slight blush tingeing her cheeks.

“Goodnight Clarke.” Her voice was breathy and Clarke smiled, a plan formulating in her mind.

“Goodnight Lexa.”

As Lexa went back to the medic tents and Clarke returned to her own, she counted the days in her head until Lexa was set to leave. Ten. She had ten days to change Lexa’s mind, to get her to act on her feelings, to prove that she was fit for the life Lexa must now lead.

And Clarke was never one to back down from a challenge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I listened to My Chemical Romance a lot while writing this, so that may account for the excess of angst.  
> BUT I promise the next one will be full of fluff. Really, I swear. 
> 
> You guys are the best. Tell me your thoughts. They will only serve to increase the amount of fluff I'm able to squeeze out of my brain.


	8. Before the Bonfire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was taking way too long, so I decided to split it in two and give you guys the first part while I finish up the rest over the next couple days. Sorry for the wait, real life has been crazy. Hope you enjoy!
> 
> :)

Clarke trained harder than she ever had over the next several days. When she wasn’t sparring in the fighting pits, she was practicing shooting with Raven, who had returned to camp a few days after the Ice Queen’s attack. At Clarke’s request, she had helped to build a pulley system of moving targets that Clarke was quickly becoming more than proficient at.

Now that Lexa was well enough to walk, she had taken to restlessly pacing around the camp, glaring at everyone who wouldn’t let her participate in rebuilding the damaged parts of the grounds. Clarke used this to her advantage, making sure to show off whenever Lexa happened to wander by her training space. The fact that this occurred quite often ignited a hopeful flutter in the pit of Clarke’s stomach, and during these moments she never failed to catch Lexa’s eye (or the embarrassed blush that followed).

On the third day, Lexa moved back into their tent. This new development presented even more opportunities for Clarke to tempt Lexa but, much to her dismay, the other girl only seemed to become more distant when in such close quarters. Any attempt at conversation was always ended abruptly, and Lexa never maintained eye contact with Clarke for more than a few seconds.

On the fifth day, Clarke was frustrated in more ways than one and she swung hard at the punching bag she was practicing on, trying desperately to think of new ideas as the ten-day mark loomed ever closer.

“Yo Princess, that bag do something to offend you?”

Clarke looked up mid-swing to see Raven leaning against a nearby post, an amused expression on her face as she watched her.

“No, I’m just a little…unsatisfied with recent events.”

“Want to be a little more vague, Clarke?”

Clarke huffed. “It’s complicated. I can’t really talk about it.”

“It’s Lexa, isn’t it?” Raven smirked. At Clarke’s surprised expression she laughed. “Oh come _on_ , all you do is drool over that girl.”

“I do not—”

“Doesn’t matter,” Raven interjected with a wave of her hand. “That’s not what I came here to talk about. Abby sent me. She wants you to come back to the Ark.”

Clarke blinked, surprised at the mention of her mother. “Come back? Because of the attack last week?”

Raven nodded. “Nearly half the camp was wiped out, Clarke. She’s worried about you.”

Clarke crossed her arms defensively, her old irritation at being told what to do flaring up immediately. “I can take care of myself. Does she just expect me to run away, after everything? And why is she sending you to deliver her messages?”

“Hey, I just do what the Chancellor tells me. And I told her you’d say that. Had to give it a try though, didn’t I?”

“Sorry,” Clarke sighed. “It’s been a rough couple of days.” She ripped off her gloves and sat tiredly on the ground. Raven followed, hesitating slightly before bumping her shoulder against hers.

“Alright, fine. Spill it. What’s wrong?”

Clarke smiled and squeezed her hand, thankful for Raven’s comfort. “You were right. It is Lexa. Things between us are a little…strained at the moment. We both want something more, but she’s leaving in a few days and won’t let me come with her.”

“Why not?”

“To protect me, I guess. Or she doesn’t think I’m strong enough. I don’t know. But she’s been avoiding me. We’ve been sleeping in the same tent for three days and she’s barely said two words to me.”

“She’s probably afraid you’ll change her mind,” Raven suggested.

Clarke shrugged. “Yeah, maybe.”

“Have you seen the way Lexa talks to anyone who’s not you Clarke? I’ve watched her stalking around camp the last few days. She’s terrifying. Except when she sees you. She sure likes to stare, that one.”

Clarke laughed despite herself, a warm feeling growing in her stomach as she thought about Lexa and the way she looked at her. Clarke could get stared at like that forever. She thought of the shape of her mouth, how soft her lips were; the way she clenched her jaw; her neck and how she sometimes daydreamed about running her lips along the length of it; the way she swallowed when she was nervous or when Clarke was too close…

Raven snapped her fingers in front of Clarke’s face and she started out of her sudden train of thoughts. “For fuck’s sake, you were just fantasizing about her staring at you, weren’t you?”

“What?” she spluttered, blushing furiously. “No, I—I wasn’t, I was just—” Clarke stopped at Raven’s laugh, shoving her in mock irritation. “Fine. I know; I’m hopeless. What do I do?”

“Maybe you just need the right circumstances.” Raven waggled her eyebrows, a mischievous smile growing on her face. “I’m also here on the request of one  
Monty Green. Apparently the wine here is shit.”

“You mean…not his moonshine?”

Raven grinned. “Ten bottles worth. I told the guards at the gate it was disinfectant. Which, I suppose isn’t totally untrue. Anyways, there’s talk of a bonfire tomorrow night. You know, the whole celebration after destruction thing.”

“Here? At camp? Indra is okay with that?”

“Probably not. But it won’t stop them from trying.”

Clarke laughed, remembering her friends’ antics from their days back at the Ark. It seemed like so long ago, a different lifetime. “Fuck, why not. We deserve to have some fun, right?”

“That’s the spirit!” said Raven happily. “Now, come on, let’s go tell the others. If we’re going to pull off this secret bonfire, we have some work to do.”

* * *

 

Clarke spent the rest of the day with Raven, talking and laughing, and it loosened the ever-present anxiety within her. After Lexa’s self-imposed isolation it was nice to have someone to keep her company, although she still ached for the heady thrill of being near her.

At dinner they met up with the rest of the Sky People, and plans for the following night were excitedly discussed. Monty produced a bottle of moonshine seemingly from nowhere and Clarke drank happily, the warmth of the alcohol and the laughter of her friends making her feel something close to human again.

Halfway through their meal Clarke spotted Lexa entering the hall. She was listening intently to Indra as she walked beside her, but when her gaze met Clarke’s across the room she didn’t look away. Clarke’s heart thumped wildly at the intensity in Lexa’s eyes but she stared back just the same, smirking when the other girl stumbled over her own feet. It wasn’t until Raven threw an arm over her shoulders, pulling her back into the table’s conversation that she looked away from Lexa.

Raven walked with Clarke back to her tent, surprising her with her own bottle of moonshine to use if she needed extra help convincing Lexa. Not wanting her newfound happiness to end so quickly, Clarke invited her inside and twisted open the alcohol, each in turn taking long swigs from the bottle.

It wasn’t until her third drink that Clarke looked up to see Lexa glaring daggers at the pair of them, one hand still holding the flap of the tent open above her.

“Lexa! What are you—”

“This is our _tent_ Clarke,” Lexa seethed. “Some of us would like to use it to sleep.”

Clarke could only stare, open-mouthed, the sharpness of Lexa’s gaze and the buzz of alcohol stirring something pleasant in her stomach.

“And that’s my cue,” mumbled Raven. She sat up abruptly from her spot on Clarke’s bed, moving to leave before Lexa cut her off.

“Don’t bother,” she said harshly. “I’ll go. I wouldn’t want to interrupt.”

Before Clarke’s sluggish brain could catch up to the sudden turn of events, Lexa stalked out of the tent and Raven gaped after her, yanking Clarke to her feet when she noticed her lack of responsiveness.

“Fuck Clarke, this is no time to be flustered, go after her before she murders someone!”

“Wha—oh yeah, right!”

Clarke pulled herself together and hurried after Lexa, the ground tilting slightly as she stepped outside the tent. It wasn’t long before she spotted a whip of brown hair heading towards one of the gardens outside the hall, and she followed without hesitation.

“Lexa…Lexa, wait…” Clarke tripped several times, the moonshine making her clumsy. After the third stumble she called out, frustrated. “Lexa would you just fucking wait a second?”

Lexa stopped, whipping around so suddenly that Clarke swayed backwards as she advanced on her. “What do you want, Clarke?” she snapped, and the way she clicked her tongue around the _k_ sounded much more menacing than she had become accustomed to.

“You’re not…mad are you?” she asked lamely, already knowing the answer.

“Do you really need to ask me that?”

Clarke exhaled audibly, shifting away from Lexa and her anger. “Honestly Lexa, I don’t know. You’ve barely spoken to me at all these past few days.”

There was silence for a few moments and Clarke turned her head, somewhat dazedly meeting Lexa’s still unreadable gaze as she spoke. “I thought that I was clear—”

“Oh, you were. Perfectly. I guess I’m just wondering what you expect me to do while I stay here, waiting for you to ride off to your destiny.”

“I don’t expect you to do anything Clarke.”

“I know,” Clarke snapped, a bit harsher than she had intended. “And that’s the problem. I can’t just sit here and do _nothing_. Sharing space with you, seeing you everyday, counting down the days until I don’t…” She sighed, wishing she still had that bottle of moonshine with her. “I just want to feel something.”

“Is that what you were doing with that girl? Feeling something?”

Clarke seethed. She squared her shoulders, tensing to push back Lexa’s aggression. “You really think I’m that kind of person? That I’d flaunt someone like that in front of you?”

Lexa averted her eyes, trying to slip her impassive mask back on, but Clarke could hear the bite in her words. “You are asking as if I should know, Clarke.”

“Because you should know,” Clarke balked. “What do you want from me Lexa? You say you can’t be with me, but then get angry when I try to find comfort in a friend…do you have any idea what it’s like to have all this…all these feelings for you inside of me and not be able to do anything about it?”

Lexa stilled suddenly, staring so hard at Clarke that she had to resist the urge to shrink away. Instead she clenched her fists at her side, willing her body not to move as Lexa stepped forward. She was familiar with this game they played, this silent struggle for dominance, pushing into each other’s personal space until someone gave in to whatever it was that kept pulling them together. Clarke knew it well, but that didn’t mean she was any better at resisting.

“You think I don’t know what it’s like?” Lexa asked quietly, and Clarke tried to ignore the frantic fluttering in her chest.

“Sometimes,” Clarke responded, voice strong even as she surrendered to Lexa’s challenge, moving backwards until her back pressed against the rough wall of the gathering hall. “I wonder if you feel what I do.”

Clarke heard Lexa growl, something low and wild and predatory before sharp hips knocked into hers and a thigh was pressed between her legs, the lips she so often fantasized about hovering tantalizingly close to her own. A breathy moan rose in her throat but she held it down, the resulting sound somewhere between a whimper and a groan. Lexa responded nonetheless, hands pressing against the wall on either side of Clarke’s head, bodies flush against the other.

“Is this what you wanted to feel, Clarke?” Lexa rasped, and the low octave of her voice vibrated through Clarke with a dizzying frequency.

“Don’t start som—” She stopped, sucking in a breath as Lexa pressed hard upwards. “Don’t start something you can’t finish, Lexa,” she panted, body shaking with the effort not to grind down into the thigh between her legs.

Lexa raised her eyebrows and smirked. Clarke, not able to resist any longer, slipped her hands in between them and grabbed at Lexa’s chest through her thin cotton shirt. Lexa leaned in with another growl in her throat before kissing Clarke hard, one hand moving down to pull Clarke’s leg up around her waist. She started to move against Clarke, slow and torturously rhythmic. It wasn’t long before Clarke responded in kind, days of repressed emotion melting away against the feel of Lexa’s body pressed so completely against hers.

Lexa broke the kiss first, pulling away with an unsteady exhale but Clarke put a hand behind her neck, refocusing her attentions on the other girl’s throat. She felt Lexa shake against her, a breathy version of her name coming from her lips that set Clarke on fire like she never had been before.

“Clarke…I don’t—”

A surge of noise came from the building Clarke was so desperately pressed against, the hall emptying out as dinner was finished within. Clarke stilled her mouth and Lexa shifted away from her demanding body, the sounds of the camp anchoring them back to reality.

They stared at each other for several seconds, chests heaving, before Lexa seemed to collapse against her, forehead dropping to rest on her shoulder.

“I don’t know what to do, Clarke,” Lexa whispered against her, and Clarke was reminded painfully of the fact that, like her, Lexa was only a teenager, forcibly handed more responsibility than either of them were supposed to shoulder.

Clarke wrapped her arms around her, a feeling of such fierce protectiveness for Lexa making her heart tremble within her.

“You don’t have to do everything alone,” she muttered into the skin below Lexa’s ear. She felt the girl shiver and tightened her grip around her. “I’m here, Lexa. I don’t want to leave you. Please don’t make me.”

She felt Lexa breathe in before soft lips were at her neck and Lexa held her impossibly closer.

“Okay.”

* * *

 

They walked silently beside each other, hands brushing now and then as they went back to their tent. Lexa was withdrawn, staring at the ground as she walked, brow furrowed and jaw clenched tightly. Clarke glanced at her every so often, worry bubbling in her stomach at the other girl’s sudden silence. When they reached the tent Clarke held open the flap and Lexa went straight to her bed, collapsing tiredly on top of it.

Clarke stood there awkwardly, wanting to follow Lexa into her bed, but knowing she should probably go to her own. Just as she was about to make a decision, Lexa pushed herself up on her elbows, fixing Clarke with that stare that made her knees go weak.

“Would you…lay next to me, Clarke?”

She looked shy and unsure and Clarke was walking towards her before she even finished her request. Lexa turned on her side and Clarke laid down behind her, fitting her body against her back. Lexa pulled one of her arms around her and brought it to her chest, lacing their fingers together. Clarke pressed her nose into Lexa’s hair, and held her tightly. She heard Lexa’s contented sigh and her heart swelled with affection. She wondered why they hadn’t been sleeping like this every night.

When Clarke next opened her eyes she was half on top of Lexa, her nose tucked underneath her chin and Lexa’s arms wrapped around her back. She shifted slightly to look at the girl beneath her, grinning when she saw green eyes already looking back at her.

“Were you watching me sleep, Commander?” she teased. Lexa rolled her eyes and turned on her side, unceremoniously dumping Clarke on the bed next to her.

“Would it be a problem if I was?”

“Absolutely not. I love when pretty girls stare at me.”

“It has happened often then?”

Clarke narrowed her eyes, hearing the unspoken question behind Lexa’s bantering. “I’m not sure if you want me to answer that,” she said nonchalantly, and turned onto her back, moving her arms behind her head, a smirk on her face. Sure enough, Clarke heard a low growl come from Lexa and the next moment she was hovering above her, a challenging look in her eyes.

“Tell me.”

The authority in her voice sent a shiver down Clarke’s spine. She slid her hands up Lexa’s arms, squeezing her fingers around her biceps. “Twice. One for four months, the other only a couple weeks.”

Lexa lowered herself on top of Clarke, bodies pressing temptingly against one another. She dragged her nose down the length of her neck, and Clarke arched into her impatiently.

“Yours?”

“Three.” Lexa breathed hotly against Clarke’s throat, and she bit back the moan rising from her chest. “None of them lasted long.”

Something tugged at the back of Clarke’s mind, and she gently pushed back on Lexa’s shoulders. “And Costia?”

“I loved her once…” Lexa started carefully. She looked at Clarke, gaze flicking back and forth between her eyes. “But not like this.”

Clarke reached up and pulled Lexa towards her, kissing her with as much emotion as she could muster. Lexa opened her mouth and Clarke heard herself moan at the first slide of Lexa’s tongue along hers. The sound seemed to ignite something in Lexa because she shifted downwards and there was suddenly the promising pressure of her thigh against Clarke’s center.

As Lexa began to pull back from their kiss, Clarke caught her bottom lip between her teeth, tugging lightly until she was rewarded with a quiet whimper. They broke apart and Clarke could only stare up at her with hooded eyes, heart and mind reeling with the intensity of what she felt for the girl above her.

“I want you Clarke.” Her voice was breathy and raw, and it did things to Clarke that made her hips twitch upwards expectantly. “But there are things I need to get in order first.”

She looked so regretful that Clarke couldn’t be mad at her, disappointed though she was. Lexa moved to sit on the edge of the bed and Clarke sat up, body pulsing uncomfortably.

“Indra?”

Lexa nodded. “She will not be happy with me.”

“I’m sorry,” Clarke said quietly, guilt creeping its way through her chest. Lexa turned quickly, hand reaching out to squeeze hers.

“You have nothing to apologize for, Clarke. This is my decision too.”

“What will she do?”

“Yell, mostly.” She smirked, and Clarke unconsciously shifted closer. “Indra means well. I will get her to agree eventually.”

Clarke nodded and Lexa lifted a hand to her face, thumb wiping softly across her lips. “Will you wait for me?”

Her expression was uncertain, eyes a little worried. Clarke leaned into Lexa’s touch, turning her head to press a light kiss to her palm.

“Of course I will.”

Lexa kissed her gently, one hand moving to stroke lightly through her hair. It was full of relief and promise and Clarke knew that she had fallen hard.


	9. After the Bonfire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Friendly reminder that this story is rated M.... (for SEX.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is a bit short, but...I mean....

Clarke didn’t end up seeing Lexa for the rest of the day, so she took to walking around camp, eyeing the sun warily as it inched lower and lower in the sky. Dinner passed with Clarke’s head snapping up every time someone entered the hall, and dropped heavily when she didn’t see the green eyes she was waiting for.

Octavia noticed her somber mood and tried to cheer her up with talks of the bonfire that night, but Clarke was only half listening, trying to remind herself that this morning _did_ happen. That waking up next to Lexa, breathing in the warmth of her open mouth, feeling the weight of her body on top of her own hadn’t just been a dream.

By the time she was sitting next to Raven, surrounded by groups of laughing and dancing candidates already loose with Monty’s moonshine, a heavy sense of dread sat low in her stomach. The flickering light of the bonfire made it hard to see the people around her, but she stared hopefully at every person that passed her nonetheless.

It wasn’t until their celebration was moving into the late hours of the night, heavy, electronic music blasting from several speakers Raven had rigged around their makeshift dance space, that Octavia dragged Clarke to her feet.

“Alright, Griffin. You’ve been moping for far too long tonight. We need to loosen you up!” She was lilting slightly, a half empty cup of moonshine in her hand and an easy grin on her face. She seemed to produce another cup out of nowhere and shoved it into Clarke’s hand, whooping in triumph as she tilted her head back to take a long drink.

The alcohol burned her throat and she winced at the taste, but Octavia was looking at her with such excitement that she couldn’t help but grin back.

“Hey, you guys seen Finn around?” Jasper asked, swaying slightly where he stood. “Looks like he’s the only one from the Ark missing.”

“Who the _fuck_ cares!” Raven shouted, and cheered Octavia enthusiastically. The music seemed to increase in volume dramatically and Raven whirled around toward the source. “Those fuckers better not be messing up my speakers!”

She sprinted off and Clarke chuckled. There was no way Indra could not know about their party now. Maybe she knew thought they needed some fun as much as they did. Or maybe she was too busy fighting with Lexa…

“I’m sure she’s fine, Clarke,” Octavia said, face suddenly sober. “You know how Indra is. Probably took Lexa awhile to convince her not to murder you on the spot.”

Clarke nodded and took another drink, trying to dissolve the heaviness that was steadily filling up her chest every minute she didn’t see Lexa.

Raven reappeared and flung her arm around Octavia’s shoulders, making toasts to increasingly ridiculous things and after Clarke had finished her second cup of moonshine her laughter no longer felt forced. A pleasant warmth spread along her limbs and she felt herself moving through the crowd without really knowing it, dancing with boys and girls alike, feeling light and young but still not completely whole.

When she was halfway through her third drink Clarke noticed the music had changed. A group of boys (of the Boat People, Clarke’s sluggish mind thought) were drumming a driving, rhythmic beat, and she could feel every tremor of their instruments vibrate through her chest. People were dancing closer to each other now and Clarke clumsily turned to find her friends, only to stop dead in her tracks.

She was here, finally, and staring at Clarke with an almost predatory look in her eyes. Her hair was loose and wild, and Clarke didn’t bother to hide her gaze as she raked her eyes down Lexa’s body. Her top was loose fitting, arms bare and a teasing sliver of her stomach just visible. She was wearing form-fitting shorts that stopped mid-thigh and when Clarke looked back up at her she smirked, that cocky one that drove Clarke insane, and turned just slightly, revealing that her back (and that long, somehow sensual tattoo) was entirely exposed.

Realizing that her mouth had been literally hanging open, Clarke swallowed and licked her suddenly dry lips, not sure whether she hated or loved whatever had possessed Lexa to wear _that_. But then Lexa raised her arms above her head and slowly began to sway her hips, and it took Clarke a few seconds to realize that she was dancing. Dancing _specifically_ for her, because even though they were still standing several feet apart, Lexa had never once looked away from Clarke, that same hungry look only seeming to intensify in the low light of the fire.

Clarke couldn’t do anything more than stare, even if she wanted to. She was entranced by the surprisingly graceful way Lexa moved to the music, the generous expanse of skin and tattoos sending an entirely different kind of heat through her body.

It shouldn’t have come as that much of a shock, the delicate purpose in which Lexa twisted her body. Clarke had seen her train, seen the light, fluid way in which she maneuvered her sword, but this…this was elegant.

_No_ , Clarke’s moonshine soaked brain slowly corrected. There was nothing elegant about the way Lexa was looking at her. Dark and intimidating and oh, so damn enticing. No, this, this was lewd. Provocative. And Clarke was positive she had never been this turned on before in her life.

Lexa took a step forward and Clarke exhaled shakily, body thrumming with excitement and anticipation. With another slow swing of her hips she was only feet away now; Clarke tipped her head back and swallowed the remaining alcohol in her cup, tossing it distractedly to the ground as she closed the remaining distance between them.

Now that Lexa was so close Clarke became overwhelmed with her proximity. She reached towards her but then hesitated, not knowing where she wanted her hands to be the most. Before she could decide Lexa put her hands on her waist and tugged forward so their hips collided. Keeping her hands on her sides, Lexa began to move to the beat, body pressing and sliding down Clarke’s so suggestively that she trembled against her, hands finally moving up Lexa’s arms to tangle in her hair.

Clarke danced against Lexa without really thinking, fingers scratching down her exposed back, hips grinding against her thigh and waist, forehead pressed to hers, no more than a millimeter of space between any part of their bodies. But it wasn’t enough; Clarke wanted more, _needed_ more. She leaned forward and kissed her, hard and possessive, a thrill shooting straight to her core when she felt Lexa moan against her lips.

“Clarke…” she panted, the sight of her blown pupils setting Clarke on fire. “Not here.”

“Then take me.” She leaned forward again, biting lightly at Lexa’s bottom lip. “Anywhere. Right now.”

Lexa didn’t need to be told twice, spinning around and pulling Clarke behind her as she weaved through the crowd around them. She didn’t care where Lexa was taking her, as long as it meant that she could touch and be touched. Unfortunately before they could get very far, they were interrupted by a group of familiar faces.

“CLARKE! And you found her! Lexa…” Octavia bent forward in a drunken sort of bow. “It is fantastic to officially be in your presence.”

Lexa glanced at Clarke, clearly confused.

“Right, uh, Octavia,” Clarke started, forcing herself back into a coherent state of mind, “We were just leaving actually, so—“

“Have you had this moonshine?” Octavia all but shouted at Lexa. “You haven’t right? Clarke you can’t leave without giving Lexa a taste of Skaikru tradition!”

Lexa laughed and Clarke looked over, the sound making her breath catch in her throat.

“Since when has moonshine been one of our traditions?” Clarke asked.

“Since an hour ago,” Octavia answered with a flippant wave of her hand. She grabbed a cup out of Monty’s hand (“I was _drinking_ that Octavia!”) and offered it forward. “Now Lexa, would you do us the honor?”

Clarke stepped forward, about to spare Lexa the awkwardness of turning down Octavia, but she shook her head, smiling as she took the cup. “It would be my pleasure,” Lexa said, not taking her eyes off of Clarke. She tilted her head back and drained the cup in one gulp, raising her eyebrows suggestively at Clarke as she handed it back to Octavia.

Octavia whooped and Clarke’s mouth watered. It wasn’t until they had been enthusiastically given two more drinks each that they were able to slip away, walking fast in the direction of their tent. Clarke felt like her entire body was radiating warmth, the source coming from the hand that was entwined with Lexa’s.

They exchanged glances frequently during their walk, giggling and blushing when their shoulders bumped into one another, both a little clumsy from moonshine. When they reached their tent Lexa held open the flap for Clarke, who pulled her inside close behind her.

The tent seemed unusually quiet after the noise from the bonfire, but when Lexa stepped closer all Clarke could hear was the pounding of her own heart in her ears. She tilted her head up and their kiss turned from gentle to insistent in seconds. Lexa grabbed Clarke’s hips and pulled her body roughly against hers, tongue moving slowly across the roof of her mouth. Clarke stumbled back a few steps from the intensity of the kiss and Lexa moved with her, fingers sliding ever so slightly underneath the hem of her shirt.

Clarke broke the kiss but stayed pressed against Lexa, hands gripping her hair tight as she felt long fingers move higher up her back to push lightly at the edge of her bindings.

“Is this okay?” Lexa breathed, and Clarke felt herself begin to pulse, the combination of her raspy voice and swollen lips making her hips jerk forward against Lexa’s.

“I’ve been fantasizing about you touching me since the lake,” she husked, delighting in the barely restrained moan that escaped Lexa’s lips. She lifted her arms and Lexa pulled her shirt over her head, eyes dropping instantly to Clarke’s chest. Her hands were soft as she skimmed up her stomach and when she leaned forward to press a kiss to the base of her throat, Clarke couldn’t wait any longer.

“We can go slow later,” she said, taking Lexa’s shirt off in one quick movement and pulling her forwards as she walked them back to the bed. “But right now, I need you on top of me.”

Lexa smiled and hummed low in the back of her throat. “As you wish.” She wrapped her arms around Clarke and lifted her up easily, lowering them both onto the bed. After a quick press of her tongue to Clarke’s pulse point Lexa sat up so she was straddling Clarke’s waist, and began to slowly undo her bindings. Clarke watched her with hooded eyes, swallowing hard when she tossed the material off the side of the bed.

“Fuck,” she muttered and pushed herself up, fingernails scratching up Lexa’s back as she flicked her tongue out to lightly brush across a dusky nipple. She felt Lexa shudder against her and breathe out something that sounded like her name. Taking this as a sign of encouragement, Clarke put her mouth around the swell of Lexa’s breast and sucked, earning a sharp grind of hips down against her own.

Lexa tugged her head up and kissed her hungrily, continuing to slowly ride Clarke’s thigh as her hands worked on unwinding her bindings. Clarke was uncomfortably wet now, and when her chest was finally free and Lexa pushed her down onto her back she was dizzy with arousal. The sight of Lexa hovering above her, topless and flushed was overwhelming and she reached up, tangling her fingers in the wild curls of brown hair.

“You’re so beautiful.”

Lexa dipped her head and the shy smile that turned up her lips made Clarke’s heart swell with affection.

“I’ve never seen anyone like you before, Clarke.” She moved her hands up her stomach and lightly cupped her full breast, thumb circling a strained nipple. When Clarke arched up into her she squeezed harder, the other hand trailing down to skim across the waistband of her pants.

Clarke rocked her hips upward anxiously. “Lexa…”

“You are not very patient, are you?”

“Not when a half naked girl is straddling me.”

Lexa smirked and then lowered her head, kissing Clarke once on the stomach and then pulling the strings that held up her pants loose with her teeth. Clarke couldn’t hold back her whimper, the feeling of Lexa’s mouth so close to where she wanted her making her body vibrate with need.

Lexa shifted farther down, pulling her shoes off and then her pants and underwear in one motion. Clarke gripped the sheets as Lexa dragged her fingers up her thigh, heart pounding against her chest as her lips soon followed.

Lexa kissed the line of her hip, and spoke low and breathy against her skin. “Can I taste you Clarke?”

“Yes,” Clarke panted, “Please, just…do whatever you want.”

The first touch of her tongue made Clarke’s entire body twitch and she lifted her hips upward, trying to get closer. Lexa seemed just as eager and gripped her thighs, pulling one leg up and over her shoulder as she licked again. Clarke was muttering obscenities under her breath, back arching off the bed as Lexa swirled her tongue and then ran her teeth lightly over her clit.

“Lexa, fuc—“ Her words turned into a high-pitched moan as she felt Lexa’s tongue push inside her and _god damn_ she never knew someone’s mouth could work such wonders. Her hips started to move of their own accord and she reached down to bury her fingers in that beautiful hair again, feeling her climax approaching.

Clarke pushed herself up on one elbow to watch and the sight of Lexa, eyes closed, head bobbing up and down between her legs sent her over the edge. She sucked in a sharp breath and fell back against the bed again, body trembling as her orgasm ripped through her.

She felt Lexa sigh against her, licking lightly once more before she crawled back up, pressing one kiss in the middle of her chest and another on her chin. Clarke opened her eyes to see Lexa lick her wet lips and then suck her bottom lip into her mouth when she saw Clarke watching her.

“Was that alright?” she asked, softly.

Clarke laughed and reached up to pull her down on top of her, kissing her fully on the mouth. “That was fantastic. You are fantastic. And so, so unbelievably sexy.” She rolled them over and Lexa stared up at her, suddenly out of breath. Without breaking eye contact, Clarke reached down, fingers rubbing against Lexa through her shorts.

Lexa gasped and Clarke pressed harder against the thin material, moving in tight circles as the other girl’s hips canted upwards.

“Clarke… _beja_ …”

Clarke didn’t know what the word meant but she had a pretty good guess as Lexa started to tug her shorts down herself. Taking the hint, Clarke helped her pull her shorts and then underwear down her legs. Not able to resist any longer, she ran two fingers along the length of Lexa’s damp, exposed center, and was rewarded with a low moan and rough hands pulling her face upwards.

Lexa sucked Clarke’s bottom lip into her mouth before guiding her hand back down, legs spreading wide in anticipation. Clarke obliged, pushing one, then two fingers inside her soft warmth.

“You’re soaking,” Clarke breathed. She curled her fingers and Lexa whined. The sounds coming out of the girl beneath her, quiet but full of barely restrained intensity, sent shivers down her spine and she started to slowly pump in and out of her. Lexa’s hands slid up into Clarke’s hair and she pressed their foreheads together before moving her hips to match her pace, bodies rocking and sliding against each other.

“Harder,” she pleaded, and Clarke shifted to put the weight of her hips behind her thrusts. It didn’t come as too much of a surprise that Lexa liked it rough, but it sent a new wave of arousal through her nonetheless. Lexa’s movements started to become frantic and Clarke followed suit, bending down to suck at the soft skin of her breasts while her free hand twisted a nipple between her fingers. She felt Lexa tense beneath her and she looked up just in time to see her head thrown back, mouth falling open in a silent gasp for breath.

Clarke slowed her pace as Lexa rode out her high, pulling out once she felt her body relax beneath her. Lexa opened her eyes slowly and Clarke kissed her, soft and gentle.

“Why did we wait so long to do that?” Clarke asked. Lexa grinned, tucking a strand of blonde hair behind her ear.

“I promise I will make it up to you.”

“Care to list the ways?”

“I’d rather show you.” Clarke raised her eyebrows as Lexa sat up, pulling so she was sitting in her lap, thighs straddling her waist.

“Think you’re ready to go again?”


	10. Taken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Moderate Violence, A heap of Angst

“Clarke.”

The girl stirred, stretching out her legs, but burying her face farther into the pillow. There was a gentle pressure on her arm but she twitched it away, not wanting to be bothered.

The pressure returned, this time dragging slowly down her spine. The voice spoke again but it was softer this time, and she could feel it fan lightly across her shoulders.

“Wake up, Clarke…”

Her eyes opened of their own accord as her body instinctively responded to the voice and she blinked slowly, the face hovering above her coming gradually into focus.

“Mmm…what is it…?”

The corner of Lexa’s mouth twitched and she leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek. Clarke’s brain went into a kind of dampened fluster at the touch and she took a deep breath, still trying to get her bearings in check.

“I want to take you somewhere,” Lexa whispered. She moved closer again, this time brushing her lips across Clarke’s naked shoulder. “Will you come with me?”

Clarke nodded, reaching out to lazily run a hand over Lexa’s hip and up her side. When she reached her chest Lexa raised her eyebrows and Clarke paused, a coy smile on her face.

“What time is it?”

“It is three hours before the sun rises.”

Clarke groaned, dropping her hand and pushing not so subtlety into the warm body next to her. “And why do we need to get to this place so early in the day?”

She felt Lexa shift next to her, an arm wrapping around her waist before she moved up to press a kiss to her neck.

“Because we will not be able to get there if we are seen.”

Lexa slipped out of bed and Clarke reluctantly pushed herself up on her elbows. She allowed herself a few moments of shameless staring before she followed suit, pulling on a few light pieces of armor at Lexa’s insistence.

“Where is it exactly we are sneaking off to?”

Lexa straightened up from where she was lacing her boots, tossing a sheathed dagger to Clarke with a small smirk. “If I told you, then it would not be a surprise.”

Clarke followed Lexa past the rows of silent tents, the stillness of early morning and the way Lexa kept glancing back at her with barely restrained mischievousness filling her insides with giddiness and a longing for reckless adventure. It was only when they were a comfortable distance into the woods and away from camp that Lexa slowed her pace, waiting for Clarke to catch up.

“You are lucky you are my Second,” Lexa teased. “Your stomping through the forest does not leave much to the imagination.”

Clarke scowled, shoving playfully at Lexa as she came to stand beside her. “Yeah, whatever. How far are we going anyways? I thought we weren’t supposed to leave unless we were given an assignment?” She paused, quirking up an eyebrow. "I never pegged you as one to bend the rules.”

Lexa shrugged, flipping her knife idly in her hand as she started to walk again. “Being the Commander has its advantages. I do not bend rules. I make them.”

Clarke grinned. “Cocky. I like it.”

“I think I’d rather refer to it as confidence. But yes, I suppose.”

They continued on for several more minutes, Clarke’s heart putting on a small flurry of speed when Lexa paused to hold out a hand to help her step over a fallen tree. When she had stepped back on solid ground and Lexa still didn’t let go, she was sure that her heart would never slow back down again.

The path they were following began to slope upwards, becoming increasingly rockier the higher they went. Just as her legs were beginning to burn in protest, Lexa reached out and helped pull Clarke up to the final ledge, and when she saw the view her breath caught in her throat.

They were several feet above the tree line, the tips of the mountains just visible over the thick spread of early morning fog. Everything was quiet and still, the sky beginning to burn a deep red.

"Lexa...it's beautiful..."

They sat down, leaning against the rocky outcropping, watching as the sun slowly crept into view over the treetops.

"I am not sure if I'll have the luxury of doing things like this once we leave," Lexa said quietly. "I wanted to bring you here while I still had the chance."

Clarke frowned, reaching out to reclaim Lexa's hand in her own. "You talk like being the Commander is a death sentence."

Lexa tilted her head down, solemn. "In some ways it is Clarke. The Ice Queen is not an enemy to be taken lightly."

Clarke nodded slowly, remembering what it felt like to watch her plunge a sword into Lexa’s shoulder.

And even if I do defeat her," she continued, "There will always be more like her."

"Are you afraid?"

Clarke watched as Lexa's eyes flicked away, jaw clenching as she stared out over the ledge. It was several quiet moments before she spoke.

"I know what I must do. The circumstances in which I am claiming my throne are not ideal, but there has never been any other choice for me."

"...That doesn't answer my question."

Lexa swallowed. "No. I am not afraid. Not for me."

She looked at her, eyes wide and worried and Clarke squared her shoulders, seeing what was coming before she spoke.

"If you're going to start this again..."

"Clarke, please--"

"No Lexa," she warned. "We've already talked about this. I'm going with you."

Lexa sighed, a hint of frustration in the slight way she jerked her head, but she leaned into Clarke nonetheless, moving their still joined hands into her lap.

"Then if we are going to do this...together...I need you to stay close."

Clarke wriggled her eyebrows, smirking as she put her chin on Lexa's shoulder. "Done and done."

But Lexa moved away, fixing her with a hard stare.

"I am serious, Clarke. The Ice Queen has informants everywhere. It will not take her long to put together the nature of our relationship. And when she does, she will stop at nothing to exploit it."

Lexa's grip on her hands was tight now, and Clarke, for the first time, could see the fear she had talked about. It was unnerving. She had become so used to seeing Lexa as this unmovable force, confident and strong and never wavering.

"I'll be careful, I promise. Now can you please stop worrying so much? I thought you were supposed to be romancing me right now."

She smiled and then pulled Clarke close, resting her head on top of hers as they watched the sun finish its ascent.

 

*  
Lexa led her to a small lake next, and when she started to slowly peel off her armor Clarke followed immediately, using eager hands to help her remove the rest of her clothing. Clarke made sure to pepper kisses across each newly exposed part of Lexa’s skin, kisses that turned messy and open-mouthed and then turned into just tongue- light, lustful caresses that increased as they got down to just their underwear.

When Lexa’s knees began to shake she grabbed Clarke and lifted her up and into the lake, jumping in right behind with a large splash and a muffled series of obscenities from Clarke. They floated lazily in the water and as the morning grew later Lexa’s touches became desperate, the hard way in which she kissed her, the way she grabbed at her shoulders and hips rattled inside of Clarke and she gave it back as best she could.

Lexa pulled them up to the shore and pressed Clarke into the ground, hands already nudging aside her wet underwear, still plastered to her skin from the lake. She was demanding and aggressive, sucking at her neck and rubbing teasingly against her entrance with her thigh and (finally) her fingers. Clarke thought she just might combust from the opposite sensations she was feeling, the coolness of the air against her damp skin and the burning warmth that seemed to radiate from everywhere Lexa’s body touched hers. It felt like they were celebrating the last of something, and maybe they were. The last time they could be like this, together, with no one and nothing to worry about. The last time they could be just them, Clarke and Lexa, with no people to lead or wars to circumvent.

As the sun reached it’s highest point in the sky they lay sprawled out on the bank, hands still clasped together and bodies still pulsing lightly from their hasty coupling. Clarke was tempted to drift off to sleep right there, the afternoon warmth and the feeling of Lexa pressed against her lulling her into a comfortable stupor. But just as she began to nod off Lexa moved from beside her and sat up, groaning quietly as she rolled her shoulders.

“We should begin to make our way back, Clarke.”

Clarke opened her eyes to see Lexa already pulling on her t-shirt and she reached out, twisting her fingers in the hem of the worn cotton.

“What’s the rush? I’m pretty sure I have nothing to do today.”

“Indra is probably storming through camp as we speak,” Lexa sighed. “And these woods…” She paused, eyes darting around them as she checked the perimeter on instinct. “I would not like to stay here for too long. There are too many places to hide.”

Clarke reluctantly pushed herself up and out of comfort for the second time that day, taking the discarded pants Lexa held out to her. “Do you ever not think someone is trying to kill you?”

Lexa smirked for the briefest of seconds, but gave her a firm answer nonetheless. “The moment you let your guard down is the moment a skilled enemy will use to their advantage.”

Clarke sighed, but gave her hand an affectionate squeeze anyways. “I’ll take that as a no, then.”

As they made their way back to camp Clarke noticed the tense way in which Lexa moved beside her, one hand maintaining a constant tight grip on the hilt of her sword while the other never hovered far from Clarke’s own. The bright afternoon sun cast harsh shadows on the forest around them and Clarke found herself feeling tense and on edge as she watched Lexa squint suspiciously into the darkened parts they passed. When she finally convinced her to stop and take a break, it was only with great reluctance that Lexa perched herself on a large tree stump, foot tapping restlessly against the bark beneath her.

“Lexa…”

“Yes?” she answered, but kept her eyes sweeping back and forth across the area around them.

Clarke approached her, placing tentative hands on each of her shoulders.

“Would you relax, please? You’re the one who wanted to come out here, can’t we at least enjoy it for as long as we can?”

Lexa breathed out and Clarke felt her shoulders lower slightly underneath her touch. “I know. I am sorry. But my desire to spend time alone with you and my duty to protect you are often at odds with each other. It is difficult to balance both.”

Clarke smiled, stepping closer so her legs were pressed against Lexa’s knees. “As chivalrous as that is, I am capable of taking care of myself.”

“Of course,” Lexa said quickly, “Clarke, I did not mean—“

“It’s okay,” Clarke laughed. “I know, Lexa. And I appreciate that. But I also really appreciate your lips…and your hands…” She leaned forward as she spoke and Lexa moved her hands up Clarke’s sides, pulling her closer with a gentle pressure in her fingertips.

Just as Clarke bent down to kiss her she felt Lexa tense and she was suddenly whirled around and behind the tree stump. Lexa landed on her knees beside her, sword already drawn halfway out of its sheath. Clarke stilled, listening intently, until she heard what Lexa did.

The sound of two people arguing—loudly—as they walked through the forest, and getting closer.

Clarke caught Lexa’s eye and the other girl put a hand on her wrist, nodded once, and then crouched quiet and quick to the other side of the path, taking cover behind another tree. She looked back at her and then fully unsheathed her sword. Clarke did the same with dagger Lexa had given her, straightening up against the trunk as she got ready to flank whoever was coming towards them.

But…no. Something about that voice was familiar. Clarke peeked over the tree trunk and saw a messy head of brown hair, a face that was tense with indignant anger—

“Finn?!”

Clarke jumped up and Lexa immediately did the same, following her as she hurried to meet the pair of them.

“Costia,” Lexa said quietly and Clarke looked over to see the girl push her way out of the thick brush.

“Clarke, what are you doing out here?” Finn asked. His face was covered in smudges and his pants where shredded and bloody on one leg. Costia didn’t look much better, both her arms covered in scrapes and more than one dirty bandage.

“We were…um…” Clarke hesitated, glancing quickly at Lexa. Somehow, she didn’t think it would be the best idea to tell them they had snuck out to go fool around in the woods.

“Patrolling,” Lexa finished. “The Ice Queen has not fled for long.” She turned away, looking at Costia. “Are you hurt?”

“I’m alright. We ran into some bandits on our way back. They took all our stuff, but we managed to get away.”

“We could have stayed and fought,” Finn added bitterly. “Without those supplies they took, our entire quest was pointless.”

“They were _Azgeda_ ,” Costia said sharply, as though she had this argument with Finn several times over. “We had no chance against three of them.”

“You were attacked by Ice Nation?” Clarke asked. She couldn’t help but think their presence this close to camp wasn’t just a coincidence.

Costia nodded. “And I am certain I have seen them before. Here at camp- before the Ice Queen’s attack.”

“Many of the Ice Nation’s candidates have fled with their Queen,” said Lexa. She looked at Clarke, reading the worry she saw there. “I imagine we have not seen the last of them.”

Clarke sighed, shoving her gun back into her holster. It seemed the world was closing in on them faster than she wanted it to. “What supplies did they take from you, exactly?”

But Clarke never got the answer to her question.

There was a sudden surge of sound behind her and then, Lexa shoving her to the ground, a strangled scream, people she’d ever seen bursting through the trees as if from nowhere.

Clarke lifted her head and everything was so abruptly different that she couldn’t move, senses struggling to piece together what exactly just happened.

A second later she did.

She saw the arrow sticking out from Costia’s chest; Lexa draped over her body, that strangled scream coming from her mouth as she tried futilely to press her hands to the girl’s wound; Finn, falling slowly to the ground, a look of surprise frozen on his face as blood poured from a thin slice across his neck; a man, large and imposing, a face streaked with blood and white paint, stepping around the boy he just killed and walking towards her, murder in his eyes.

She reacted, pulling her gun from its holster and shooting two quick rounds into his chest. He collapsed and she turned to see Lexa on her feet, slashing furiously at her own attacker before meeting the next one just as the former fell.

But their numbers seemed never ending, more streaming from the forest as Clarke dispatched her second assailant. Clarke stumbled backwards but kept her gun trained ahead, shooting wildly in her rising panic and trying to move towards Lexa, knowing that their only chance of surviving was to somehow escape.

“CLARKE!”

She turned to see Lexa lunge forward and plunge her sword into a man Clarke hadn’t seen coming towards her, tugging the blade back out with a menacing grunt. But the distraction cost Lexa, the man she was previously fighting rising to his feet and tackling her hard into the ground. Clarke made to move towards her but she was suddenly yanked backwards by a rough hand on her wrist and then a heavy blow to the side of her head. She fell hard, face first onto the ground, her gun skittering away from her hand.

Clarke tried to think past the white sparks clouding her vision, tried to push her body past the throbbing in her head, the sting in her arm, the unknown hot and sticky pain radiating down her leg. She called out for Lexa, not knowing where she was or even if she was still alive. This last thought forced her mind back to the present and she pushed herself up, sprinting towards where she saw the glint of her gun on the ground.

She scooped it up, spinning quickly on her heel and firing four shots into the man who hit her, her aim messy from the blood dripping into her eye. The fifth shot was silent except for the clicking of the empty magazine, final and condemning.

“ _Skaigada_.”

Clarke turned quickly, watching as the last man in the clearing slowly got to his feet.

“You will come with me now.”

Clarke took half a step back, her now useless gun still gripped tightly in her hand. The man’s hands were covered in blood, his right one holding a sword…a sword that she recognized…

“What did—what did you—?” Clarke sputtered over her words, eyes glued to the body she hadn’t noticed before, the body the man was standing over, the body that was now motionless…the body that she was just beginning to get to know…

The man was walking towards her but Clarke couldn’t make herself look away. She felt her adrenaline draining, her body shaking as the pain from all her injuries flooded through her at once. He grabbed her shoulder, shoving her down to her knees. Her gun slipped from her fingers, her insides feeling like they were going to burst because Lexa _still_ hadn’t moved and this couldn’t be happening, not when she had woke up so happy, so content, so safe…

“You will not die today,” the man said. But Clarke was fading fast, struggling feebly against unconsciousness. Her world went black before she could hear the man say,

“ _Azplana_ is not finished with you yet.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:  
> Skaigada = Skygirl
> 
> Azplana = Ice Queen  
> *
> 
> Hello again (and I am so sorry)!
> 
> I wanted to see if anyone was still into reading this story, so if you are let me know and hey, sorry about that cliffhanger :P  
> (Ps: I'm not completely heartless, so don't worry friends.)
> 
> If you want to pass the time between updates, read my completed college AU, [When We Touched](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5404814/chapters/12486524)!
> 
> TiLL NExT TIme?????


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